What's the story?
by Americangirl
Summary: This is a what if fic. I was wondering what would have happened if Kelso hadn't gone to California. Would he and Jackie have really gotten married? What would the gang-espically Hyde-think of the news? *COMPLETE*!! PLEASE REVIEW!
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1  
  
Int: The Basement (Day 1) Eric, Hyde, and Fez. Eric sits on the couch, Fez on a lawn chair across from Hyde who is sitting in his usual chair. All are watching TV  
  
Eric: Hey, is it just me, or is this show alittle far fetched?  
  
Hyde: Why Forman-whatever do you mean? (smirks)  
  
Eric: Well, it just seems to me that if the Professor can make a motorcycle out of some coconuts, Mr. Howell's Teddy bear, and Ginger's bra he should be able to get them off of that damn island.  
  
Fez (shaking head): Eric, you stupid boy, the Professor does not want to leave the island! Where else would a man like him get two hot ladies fighting over his ability to make pineapples into radios?  
  
Hyde: So true...  
  
Fez: I hope one day I am lucky enough to get stranded on an island.  
  
Eric: (sarcastic)Yeah, I mean who cares about dehydration or starving to death when a real live movie star is slowly withering away with you?  
  
Fez: Exactly. Especially when that movie star is a whore like Ginger. That's how I want to go...(smiles at the thought. Eric shakes his head in disgust.)  
  
Door opens. Kelso comes running in.  
  
Kelso: You guys-I just asked Jackie to marry me!  
  
Eric: What? Why? How?  
  
Fez: You son of a bitch-now I will never have my shot at getting some hot Jackie loving  
  
Kelso: Shut up man! That's my wife your talking about! Well, my soon to be wife. They should have a word that means that. Not my wife, not my girlfriend, but in between...(thinks hard)  
  
Hyde: Is the word your looking for.... Fiancée?  
  
Kelso: What? No! That sounds all French and pansy assed. (Fake French accent) Fiancée! Give me a break! I'm not French! I'll just call her my super girlfriend!  
  
Hyde, annoyed, shrugs and walks over to the freezer for a popsicle. Leans on freezer, standing.  
  
Eric: Anyway, back to my question: WHY, OH WHY?  
  
Kelso: Well, I mean-I've cheated on her a lot. I mean A lot. And then that cheese guy came along and smooched her and it got me thinking.  
  
Hyde: This is going to be bad.  
  
Kelso: What is wrong with Jackie and me? Why do we cheat on each other?  
  
Eric: (confused) And the only logical answer was ask her to marry you??  
  
Kelso: No, at first I thought we had better end it for good.  
  
Eric: I like that plan. You should have ran with it.  
  
Kelso: I would have, but then Jackie told me I could kiss any other girl I wanted. ANYONE, and she would be OK with it. And you know what? I only wanted to kiss her.  
  
Eric: Awww.. how cute!! (sarcastic)  
  
Fez: It's like a real life episode of Happy Days. Kelso and Jackie are my very own Chachie and Joanie!  
  
Kelso: (smiling): Yeah, except I'm hotter than Chachie!  
  
Hyde: And prettier than Joanie.  
  
Kelso: Thanks man!  
  
Eric: Hold on! Can we please, please, get back to the whole throwing away your life on a cold-hearted ice queen part? I mean, when you asked Jackie to marry you?  
  
Kelso: Oh, right. So then Jackie said if I really wanted to be with her-I had to make a commitment. A real one. I have to admit I was scared. I thought about just running out of there, changing my name, and moving to Kenosha.  
  
Hyde: Yeah, she never would have found you that far away.  
  
Kelso: But I didn't. I asked her to marry me and I meant it. This time I'm going to be good to her. No more cheating.  
  
Fez: (wipes away tear) Nothing Chachie has ever done has compared to this! (goes over to Kelso and looks closely at him) And you are much prettier than Joanie!!!  
  
Basement-Day 2 Fez on the lawn chair, Hyde in his chair, Kelso and Eric on opposite sides of the couch Eric: I really don't get Donna-you guys. I mean, first Casey dumps her, then she tries to get back with me, and now she's avoiding me.  
  
Hyde: Well-you embarrassed her. What did you think she would do?  
  
Fez: Even Amazon women have feelings, Eric!  
  
Eric: I didn't mean to embarrass her. I just didn't want to be the Casey rebound guy. I want her back so bad, but only if it's right.  
  
Jackie walks in  
  
Eric: Hey Jackie. Have you talked t0 Donna? I haven't seen her in like, 2 days.  
  
Jackie: Oh, didn't she call you? She went to California. (matter of factly. Sits down on Kelso's lap)  
  
Eric: (stands up, shocked) WHAT???  
  
Jackie(frustrated): SHE-WENT-TO-CALIFORNIA! Geez! (makes a face)  
  
Eric: No, No she devil-I heard you. The what-was in-what the hell are you talking about?  
  
Jackie (shrugs): Well, she called me last night and said she had decided to visit her Mom in California. She took a bus. I think she called me from a bus stop in (thinks) Oh some boring named state-maybe a Dakota??  
  
Eric: (yelling): Why didn't you tell me this last night?  
  
Jackie: I figured she would call you if she wanted you to know. Besides, I had bigger things on my mind .(smiles at Kelso).  
  
Hyde: Yeah, we all know about the stupidest wedding plans ever already-so no need to go into any crappy Jackie detail.  
  
Jackie: But my version is so much better-I'm sure!  
  
*Fantasy Sequence*  
  
Jackie and Kelso sit at a table in a fancy restaurant. Kelso is in a tuxedo and Jackie is wearing a fancy gown. A group of violinists play in the background.  
  
Kelso: Jackie Burkhardt I have loved you from the first day I met you. Will you please do me the honor of being my wife, so I can serve you everyday of my life? (gets down on one knee and pulls out a ring box. He opens it to reveal a huge diamond ring.)  
  
Jackie: Oh Michael! Of course I will marry you! (Kelso places the ring on Jackie's finger) This ring is so gorgeous. Everyone will be so jealous of me!  
  
Kelso: No, Jackie everyone will be jealous of me because today, you have made me the luckiest man alive!  
  
*End Fantasy*  
  
Back to the basement...  
  
Eric: What? Kelso didn't even give you a ring!  
  
Hyde: And weren't you guys at the Hub?  
  
Fez: The Hub has no musicians-unless you count that guy who plays the spoons in the corner.  
  
Jackie: I know-that is just how I've always imagined it would happen. But all that matters is I'm going to be Mrs. Michael Kelso!  
  
Kelso: Ugh Jackie! That is so not how I imagined it!  
  
Eric: You've imagined it?  
  
Fez: What a little girl!  
  
Hyde: Burn!  
  
Kelso: Just listen.....  
  
*Fantasy Sequence 2* Kelso and Jackie sit in a stadium of cheering fans. Kelso and Jackie are wearing tons of Packers gear and cheering loudly.  
  
Jackie: Oh Michael. I just love football so much. Let's go to all the games. In fact, wouldn't it be fun if I bought you season tickets?  
  
Kelso: Jackie I am so glad you said that because I think it's finally time...  
  
Jackie: Time for what?  
  
Kelso: This...  
  
Voice over loudspeaker  
  
Announcer: Attention all Packers Fans! The attractive but not conceited Michael Kelso would like to ask the hot, but slightly botchy Jackie Burkhardt to be his permanent love slave. I guess, that means wife. If you accept, it will mean a life of getting to watch Michael grow older and only more attractive!  
  
Jackie: That is so sweet! Of course I'll be your love slave!  
  
*End Fantasy Sequence 2*  
  
Back to the basement....  
  
Jackie: Michael that is the stupidest, most unromantic thing I have ever heard!  
  
Kelso: What? I said you were hot.  
  
Fez:(shakes head in disgust) You are no longer my Chachie, You aren't even my Potsy!  
  
  
  
Donna's House-Day 3  
  
Eric knocks on Donna's front door and Bob answers it.  
  
Eric: Hi Mr. Pinciotti. I was just wondering if you've heard from Donna. I really miss her.  
  
Bob: Yeah, me too Eric. I just don't understand what has gotten into her? Just because that Casey character and her are threw-she went to California?  
  
Eric: I know, I mean- she should be happy to be rid of that jerk.  
  
Bob: I never did like him. i think he made fun of my hair behind my back.  
  
Eric:(tries to be serious) No, No! There's no way anyone could make fun of your hair Mr. Pinciotti.  
  
Bob: Yeah, your right. But I still didn't like him.  
  
Eric: Do you have any idea when she'll be back?( Eric enters the living room and sits down on the couch. Bob sits down next to him)  
  
Bob: Well, she told me not to tell you.  
  
Eric: What? She did? Why?  
  
Bob gives him a knowing look  
  
Eric: I really didn't mean to hurt her. You have to believe me. I just wanted her to get over Casey before we got back together.  
  
Bob: I know son. Well, I shouldn't be telling you this but... she'll be back tomorrow.  
  
Eric: Really??(excited) How? I mean, it's only been 4 days  
  
Bob: She ran out of money in Wyoming. She called and wanted me to wire her more money for the rest of the way but I refused. I don't want my baby girl in California. People are loose out there.  
  
Eric nods in agreement daydreaming about the idea of Donna in a loose state. *Fantasy sequence 3 *  
  
Donna walking along a beach in California. A guy in a bathing suit approaches her.  
  
Guy: Hey, your pretty cute-do you wanna have sex?  
  
Donna: well, I normally wouldn't do it with any random guy-but we are in California. (thinks for a moment) OK!  
  
They run off together.  
  
*end fantasy sequence 3*  
  
Back to the Donna's living room.  
  
Eric shutters at the thought he just had.  
  
Bob: So I told her I would send her enough money to take a plane home. I guess she'd had enough of her little adventure because she agreed.  
  
Eric: Yeah, either that or she had no choice.  
  
Bob looks annoyed  
  
Eric: But I'm sure it's that she missed you. I'm sure!!  
  
Day 4-Forman's Driveway Kelso and Fez are playing basketball, Eric is sitting on the Vista Cruiser, Jackie is sitting on a porch chair, and Hyde is leaning against the porch railing-- standing.  
  
Hyde: So, your really going to be Mrs. Gomer Pyle, huh?  
  
Jackie: Shut up Steven! Michael is a lot smarter than you think.  
  
Hyde: Oh yeah-your right. Like when he challenged that Golden retriever to a fight.  
  
Jackie: (thinks) Well, he said that dog was giving a really evil look.  
  
Hyde (shakes in head in disbelief):Jackie it was a dog! Dogs don't give looks-they just sniff each other's butts.  
  
Jackie: Well, whatever. That's only one time. He's done a ton of really brilliant things too.  
  
Hyde: Oh, like cheating on you a thousand times? That was really smart, huh?  
  
Jackie: That's all over now. Besides, that really doesn't have to do with him being stupid, just very horny.  
  
Hyde: No, your right. That has more to do with you being stupid.  
  
Jackie(shocked): What is that supposed to mean?  
  
Hyde: It means that every time Kelso cheats on you-- you take him back. Then he does it again. Why do you think this time will be different? I don't really care or anything. I just don't feel like hearing you wine when you hear he banged the bachelor party stripper.  
  
Jackie: For your information, Steven Hyde-Michael has never been so committed to me in his life! He will never cheat on me again. (pauses) Besides, why are you trying to put doubts in my head?  
  
They lock eyes for a moment  
  
Hyde: If your so perfect together-why is it so easy to do?  
  
Donna comes bouncing up the driveway.  
  
Donna: Hey guys-I'm back!  
  
No one takes notice. Kelso and Fez continue to play, Eric sits on the Vista Cruiser with his head in his hands pretending not to hear, and Hyde and Jackie stay frozen, staring at each other.  
  
Donna: Hey dillholes! I said I'm back so come on and shower me with I- missed-yous!  
  
Everyone runs over but Eric  
  
Jackie: Sorry Donna. We were all just alittle surprised to see you back so soon. (looks her up and down) Please tell me you didn't wear that in California! There are movie stars there-not lumberjacks!  
  
Donna laughs and pulls Jackie into hug  
  
Donna: Shut up!  
  
Kelso: Great- girl-on-girl action! Me like!  
  
Jackie breaks away from he hug and hits Kelso over the head playfully. Donna hugs everyone and walks over to the Vista Cruiser.  
  
Donna: Hey there-buddy!  
  
Eric: Oh- gosh-look who it is-Miss Hollywood!  
  
Donna: Shut up- your such an ass! I never made it anyway.  
  
Eric: I know. Bob told me.  
  
Donna (laughs): I knew he would. He has a bigger mouth than Jackie!  
  
Eric: That's scary...  
  
Donna: Listen Eric  
  
Eric (at the same time): Listen Donna  
  
They laugh  
  
Eric: No, let me go first. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry about what happened the night you left. I just really didn't want to think that we were becoming a couple again, if you still weren't over Casey.  
  
Donna: I know Eric. When I was stuck in Wyoming I had a lot of time to think. ALOT. And I realized what an awesome guy you are. I mean any jerk would have jumped on me. But you wanted to make sure I was ready. I was mad at first. But now I realize that what you did only makes me love you more.  
  
Eric: Oh, Donna! I am so relieved to hear you say that! I thought you were going to hate me forever and end up with some bronzed California jerk. Who of course would not be better looking than me.  
  
Donna: Of course not!  
  
They hug  
  
Eric: I'm really glad your home.  
  
Later...Eric, Hyde, Fez, and Kelso in the circle in Eric's basement.  
  
Kelso: You guys- I so cannot belive I'm going to be a man bride!  
  
Hyde: What the hell is a man bride?  
  
Kelso: You know, the dude whose getting married.  
  
Hyde: You mean a groom?  
  
Kelso: Ya, whatever. I'm still going to look hot in a powder blue suit.  
  
Hyde: Kelso, man, you really need to pick up some new vocabulary before you tie the knot. (shakes head in disgust of Kelso's stupidity and looks at Eric) So, are you and Donna back to being the most boring couple ever, or is this little drama gonna play out for a few days?  
  
Eric: (smiles, and looks around the circle): Well, it's not official yet or anything. But I think it's safe to say that Eric and Donna will be getting it on again one day soon!  
  
Fez: I am so sad! Kelso is going to be a man bride, and Eric has his Jolly Red Giant back. Who do I have to love?  
  
Hyde: Look at me Fez- I don't have a girl, and I don't care. You know why? Because girls are evil.  
  
Fez: Yes, but you don't have a girl because you are mean and hairy. I am soft and exotic- I deserve a girl!  
  
Kelso: Hey no worries buddy! Just wait until my wedding day. There will be a ton of hot girls there and wedding make the ladies horny!  
  
Hyde: You know Kelso-you can't pick up any chicks at your wedding. They'll know your not single-by the whole having just watched you get married thing.  
  
Kelso: I know! I'm a totally 100% faithful guy. I'm just trying to help Fez out.  
  
Eric: You know what guys? I have such a great feeling about our senior year. Who knows? Maybe we will all be with our true loves. (Looks at Hyde) Except for you. Fez is right. You're just freakishly hairy!  
  
Kelso (laughing): Burn! Oh, what a burn!  
  
Chapter 2 is coming soon. Please R/R!!! Thanks! 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
  
Disclaimer: I forgot to put this in the first chapter so here it goes. I don't own any of the characters from T7S. They belong to Fox and Carsey- Werner who are brilliant and wonderful and would never sue a poor girl like me.  
  
Author's Note: A month has gone by since the first chapter. Everything remains the same: Donna and Eric are friends, and Kelso and Jackie are engaged. It is now the first day of school and since Donna never made it to California she doesn't have to go to Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow. Also, Jackie is still a Cheese Maiden (is she still one on the show? I couldn't remember.)  
  
P.S.: Thanks so much to all of the wonderful people who reviewed the first chapter! This is my first fanfic (except for a BTVS one I wrote a long, long time ago). Feedback is appreciated! Thanks again(  
  
Intro: School Cafeteria  
  
Donna, Kelso, Jackie, Fez, and Hyde are sitting at a lunch table.  
  
Donna: Ok, so this day totally sucks  
  
Fez (sad): I know. I thought that when you were a senior, sophomore football players couldn't beat you up anymore!  
  
Jackie: Oh Fez! That doesn't apply to foreigners!  
  
Kelso: Yeah, and how come there aren't any freshman chicks checking me out? It's a Michael Kelso tradition to have at least one freshman girl carrying my books by now!  
  
Jackie: That's horrible! Besides, your engaged now so forget about any freshmen groupies.  
  
Eric walks up to table overhearing only the end of the conversation.  
  
Eric: Oh, good- so it isn't just me who has a freshmen stalker!  
  
Donna looks stunned.  
  
Donna: What??  
  
Hyde: Actually Forman, we were just discussing the lack of freshmen action this year.  
  
Eric (embarrassed): Oh, well..Umm..it's no big deal but this girl haS been following me around all day.  
  
Donna: What girl? Where? Point her out! Donna looks frantically around the cafeteria.  
  
Kelso: Settle down, Big D! I want to hear this story.  
  
Jackie: Yeah, it's like a fairytale. How often does Eric get girls? Eww.  
  
Eric: Right-thanks evil one. Anyway, so this girl asked me where Mr. Burnett's homeroom was before first period and she's been following me around ever since.  
  
Hyde: Wait, you're sure she's a girl, right? Not a guy with long hair and man breasts?  
  
Eric: Nope, she's defiantly got the regular kind of cleavage. And she's kinda hot too.  
  
Donna: You're such a jerk! She's, like what, 14? Could you get any more pathetic?  
  
Eric: Hold on. I didn't say I was going to date her! Why are you getting so mad? Is someone in desperate need of some Eric loving?  
  
Donna: Actually, that's exactly it. I just can't live without those thirty hot seconds of passion you use to give me. OHHH BABY! (Stands up) C'mon Jackie!  
  
Jackie (stands up): Did you really have to see Eric naked for a whole 30 seconds? Yuck!  
  
They walk off.  
  
Hyde (laughing) So.. 30 seconds, huh?  
  
Fez: Yes, that is very impressive. Eric-you are a sex god.  
  
Hyde: No Fez. 30 seconds is bad. Very bad.  
  
Kelso: Yeah, I always rock Jackie's world for at least a whole commercial break. I should be your sex god!  
  
Fez: (amazed) All hail Kelso!  
  
Scene 2-Forman's Basement  
  
Kelso and Jackie are sitting on the couch together. Hyde is sitting in his usual chair.  
  
Hyde: Today totally blew. I mean, I showed up and all- why should the teachers expect me to have books?  
  
Kelso: I know. And who thought there would be homework senior year?  
  
Jackie: Well, I had a great day. Everyone was so excited to hear I was engaged!  
  
Hyde: Oh, everyone was huh? (Mocking tone) The cheerleading squad almost died when they heard didn't they? And what about Janitor Bob? Did he just squeal with joy?  
  
Jackie: Shut up Steven! Anyway, like I was saying- everyone wanted to see my ring but I had none to show them. (Looks at Kelso)  
  
Kelso: What baby? A ring is coming soon-I swear!  
  
Jackie: When Michael? We've been engaged for a month and you haven't even gotten a job to pay for a ring.  
  
Kelso: Look. These things take time. You just can't jump on the first thing out there. I'm a talented guy. I have to weigh my options carefully.  
  
Hyde: Should I be a circus clown? Or should I pick up trash on the side of the highway? Tough call.  
  
Kelso: I know! But Jackie, I promise I'll have the best engagement ring ever on your perfect fingers soon.  
  
Jackie (gets up): Ok, fine. I have to go to work, since I'm the responsible one in this relationship. Jackie leaves. Hyde goes over to the opposite end of the couch and sits down.  
  
Hyde: So , why haven't you gotten a ring for Jackie?  
  
Kelso: I don't know. I love Jackie. I really do. But a ring-- that's so final and stuff. Once you give a girl an engagement ring she's going to think it's serious.  
  
Hyde: (sarcastic) You don't say? Kelso: And I want to be serious with Jackie- I do. But I want a long engagement. I don't want to get married before Jackie's out of high school. That's so Beverly Hillbillish and not in a discovering oil in your backyard kind of way.  
  
Hyde (shakes head in disbelief) I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. It's a simple question: Do you want to marry Jackie?  
  
Kelso: Yes, no, I don't know. I don't want to break up with her but..(trails off in thought)  
  
Hyde: Look man. You have to figure this out before Jackie comes crying to me about how you jilted her at the altar.  
  
Kelso: Hyde, Jackie would never do that. She hates you again.  
  
Hyde: Yeah, well maybe. But I don't want to take any chances. So, just take some time- push all those thoughts of cars driving themselves.  
  
(Kelso smirks at the thought)  
  
Leprechauns fist fighting  
  
(Kelso grins wider)  
  
And what the moon taste like  
  
(Kelso smiles widely and chuckles to himself)  
  
out of your head and concentrate on Jackie.  
  
Kelso: Your right Hyde. You're such a good friend. Besides, everyone knows the moon tastes like Swiss cheese.  
  
Kelso opens the door to leave as Eric walks in.  
  
Eric: WOMEN!  
  
Kelso: I know. Hey, I'd love to talk but I have some serious thinking to do (looks at Hyde) and No, not about leprechaun wrestling matches!  
  
Kelso leaves.  
  
Eric: Right, so now on to real problems. This freshmen girl-Kate-won't leave me alone! She's everywhere. I don't know how she does it! She's like some secret agent.  
  
*Fantasy sequence 1*  
  
Eric walks down the hallway at school. Kate hides behind a corner, peeking out. She talks into her watch.  
  
Kate: I've spotted him by the gym!  
  
She jumps out in front of Eric.  
  
Kate: Hey, fancy meeting you here!  
  
Eric looks terrified.  
  
Later:  
  
Eric stands in line at the cafeteria. A lunch lady slops mashed potatoes onto his tray, and  
  
He moves on. The lunch lady turns and around and talks into her pot.  
  
Lunch Lady: He's heading towards the Jell-O!  
  
Kate starts running down the hall and into the cafeteria.  
  
Kate: Thanks secret agent Hairnet! (She speaks into her watch) She jumps in front of the Jell-O line, grabs two and turns around to Eric.  
  
Kate: So, I guess we both like desserts that jiggle!  
  
She winks at him.  
  
Eric starts to cry. *End Fantasy Sequence 2 *  
  
Hyde: It can't be all that bad. You said she was hot. You pretty much never have hot girls following you around- unless you count Donna, and that's more of you following her around like the sissy boy that you are.  
  
Eric (punches Hyde in the shoulder): Donna is the problem though. She's really pissed about this Kate thing. We were so close to getting back together but nothing has happened so far. And now every time I try to talk to her about it, Kate jumps out of a dumpster or something, and Donna storms off.  
  
Hyde: Why must I be so wise? Why do all of my less enlightened friends have to look to me for advice? Look, just go over to Donna's house and talk to her. Do your puppy dog; Eric needs his big strong woman routine. Then tomorrow, you can let this freshmen girl down easy. Problem solved.  
  
Eric (sarcastic): Gee, Hyde. That sounds great! Why didn't I think of that? Oh wait I did- but Donna's not speaking to me and Kate won't leave me alone- even after I borrowed a bullhorn from the cheerleaders to shout "Please take pity on me!" to her.  
  
Hyde: Looks like your screwed them my friend. Oh, well. Let's watch I Dream of Jeanie.  
  
Hyde gets up and turns on the T.V.  
  
Eric begins to protest Eric: But.  
  
Hyde holds up his hand to silence him  
  
Hyde: Jeanie's on. No Talkie!  
  
Scene 3 -Donna's bedroom  
  
Donna and Jackie sit on Donna's bed talking.  
  
Donna: Jackie, I don't know why I'm so bugged about this freshmen thing.  
  
Jackie: Well, it is unnerving to think about Eric with a stalker. How sad can this girl be?  
  
Donna: Shut up! I think Eric is very stalker worthy.  
  
Jackie: Then why don't you just go across the driveway and tell him that?  
  
Donna: I don't know. I guess I'm just being stubborn, but I want Eric to make the first move. I'm always the aggressor.  
  
Jackie: Yeah, but if you wait too long-believe it or not-another girl might snatch him up.  
  
Donna: Wow Jackie. That was surprisingly insightful.  
  
Jackie: I thought you would like it. And the quicker I said it -the quicker we could get off of this snoorefest and onto my problems.  
  
Donna: Ok, Ok! What's wrong in engagement land?  
  
Jackie: Michael won't buy me an engagement ring. He won't even get a job to save money to eventually buy me a ring. It's really pissing me off!  
  
Donna: Jackie- your engagement to Kelso shouldn't just be about some shiny, expensive ring he puts on your finger. It should be about how much you guys love each other.  
  
Jackie: I know. And the truth is - when I was a little girl I use to dream about getting engaged and it never had anything to do with a ring, or an expensive wedding, or any of that stuff. In my fantasy, the guy could have bought me one of those 25 cents rings from a grocery store machine and I would have been happy. But with Michael, it's different.. We're not like you and Eric. Sometimes our good looks are all we have in common!  
  
Donna: Thanks a lot!  
  
Jackie: No, I mean, sometimes all we have is the superficial. Just the making out, fighting, and making up. Michael does something dumb, I get mad, he does something sweet, and we make up. That's our relationship.  
  
Donna: You've been together for a while. There has to be more to it than that.  
  
Jackie: I don't know. Sometimes I wonder what Michael and I will talk about if we spend the rest of our lives together. Maybe that's why I'm making such a big deal about this stupid ring. Fights give our relationship some depth.  
  
Donna (leans over to hug Jackie): I think you know what you have to do.  
  
Jackie: Ask my daddy to buy me the most expensive diamond ring ever??  
  
Donna: No. You have to talk to Kelso about whether this engagement is even a good idea at all.  
  
Jackie: I know. But after this weekend, ok? There's a huge shoe sale at the mall ,and it just wouldn't be fair to ruin that.  
  
Donna: Ok, you can procrastinate until Monday, but then you have to talk to him. I know it'll be hard, but you can't run away from it.  
  
Jackie (nods in agreement): I know.  
  
Scene 4-Forman's Driveway  
  
Eric is shooting hoops by himself, when Donna approaches him  
  
Donna: Hey, imagine seeing you with out your fan club. What's her name? Kathy? Crazy? What was it?  
  
Eric: For your information, it's Katie, and she's a very lovely girl.  
  
Donna: Really?  
  
Eric: For a recently escaped mental patient.  
  
Donna: (laughing): So yeah- I'm kinda embarrassed about that little scene I made in the cafeteria the other day.  
  
Eric: (faking shock) What scene? Oh, the storming out after lying about my sexual abilities?  
  
Donna: Yeah, sorry. It was always at least a minute. (Laughs) But I guess you know that I was kind of jealous of your new lady.  
  
Eric: Yep. I figured. Who wouldn't be jealous of a 14 year old who hides in lockers to jump out at me?  
  
Donna: Well, after talking to Jackie- I realized I could do one of two things. Sit by and watch thus girl cling to you or tell you that I still love you, kiss you, and scare this girl away tomorrow morning. Either way- it's your choice.  
  
Eric: I'll take option number two. But promise me that you'll go easy on dear, sweet Kate.  
  
Donna: I'll try. But if she tries anything funny- She's going down!  
  
Eric: Understood.  
  
They kiss  
  
End scene- The cafeteria  
  
Donna, Eric, Hyde, Kelso, and Jackie.  
  
Donna: So I thought, I can't yell at this poor for being charmed by Eric's hunky body.  
  
Eric: No, she was powerless really.  
  
Donna: So I came up with a new plan. If she was desperate- I mean- clever enough to see that Eric was the perfect man , then maybe she would think someone else was too. Cafeteria door opens. A bright light shines on Fez and Kate walking through the door.  
  
Fez: Hello my friends. I'd like you to meet my new lady love-Kate.  
  
Katie: Hi everyone!  
  
They walk away, hand in hand.  
  
Jackie: This girl liked Eric and then Fez? I just don't understand this younger generation at all!  
  
Donna: I know, she's a strange one. But at least I got her way from my Eric bear!  
  
Hyde: Oh no. Now that there back together we have to deal with this love crap again. I'm leaving.  
  
Hyde, Kelso, and Jackie get up and leave  
  
Eric: Who needs them anyway? What do you say we find a broom closet and see if we can make it a whole 2 min. this time?  
  
Donna: That would be a new Eric record. I'm one lucky lady!  
  
They run off.  
  
Chapter 3 will be posted soon. I promise more romance in the next chapter and some J/H goodness. Please R/R. Thanks!!! 


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Not mine. Never will be mine- no matter how I hard I pray..  
  
Author's Note: Donna and Eric are not engaged in this Fic (at least not yet), as it is a what if Fic. I realized that some of the early banter in this chapter makes it seem like they are, but it's just general Eric burning.  
  
Once again I would just like to thank all of the people who took the time to review my little fic. It really encourages me to avoid my schoolwork and keep writing. Thanks! I think there may be one or two more chapters after this; we'll see how it goes.. P.S.-This is a long chapter. I hope you like it!  
  
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Chapter 3  
  
Int. Forman's Kitchen- Dinner.  
  
Kitty is cooking, Red, Eric, and Hyde are sitting at the kitchen table.  
  
Kitty: (walking over to the table, carrying a bowl): I think you'll love tonight's mashed potatoes. (Slyly winks at Hyde).  
  
Red: Of course we will. We always love everything you make, don't we Eric?  
  
Eric: (eating a spoonful of mashed potatoes): Oh, yeah Mom. I just love your lumpy mashed potatoes.  
  
Hyde (punches him in the arm): Hey man. The lumps equal love.  
  
Eric (confused): Sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I had no idea you were so defensive of my mom's side dishes. (Thinks) Wait a minute.you didn't mind when I insulted her yams yesterday.  
  
Hyde: Your point?  
  
Eric (eyes widening): YOU made the mashed potatoes! You're my mom's little kitchen helper! Your 're Kitty's little cook in training! How sweet. (Laughing)  
  
Red: You know, Eric- It would do you some good to help your mother in the kitchen. Lord knows that Pinciotti girl doesn't know her way around an oven.  
  
Hyde: That's right. You're going to be cooking for Donna for the rest of your life. I only had to help your mom once, (coughs) Mr. Donna Pinciotti.  
  
Kitty takes off her apron and hands it to Eric.  
  
Kitty: In that case, we better get started. We have a lot of work to do.  
  
Eric puts on the apron as Red and Hyde laugh at him. Kitty leads him over to the oven as the phone rings.  
  
Kitty: Can you take out the bread while I answer this?. (Picks up the phone). Hello? No, she's not here. I think she went shopping with her friend Donna;. Yes, Yes, Ok I will. (Hangs up phone.)  
  
Eric grabs the bread with out any oven mitts on.  
  
Eric: OW! OW! OW! (Drops bread on the floor)  
  
Red: Could you have your head any further up your ass? Steven, go help him with the bread.  
  
Kitty (still standing by the phone): FORGET ABOUT THE BREAD!  
  
Eric: Mom, what is it?  
  
Kitty: It's your little friend Jackie. That was her maid on the phone.  
  
Hyde: What's wrong? Does she want Jackie to hurry home and point out all the spots she missed while dusting?  
  
Kitty: Well, that is just really cruel Steven! Just cruel!  
  
Eric: This must be bad.  
  
Kitty: Her father has been arrested. He's going to jail.  
  
Red: Dammit Eric! How the hell do you manage to become friends with all of the kids with dumbasses for parents? No offense Steven.  
  
Hyde: No problem Red. Well, I guess it's all up to you Mrs. Forman. (Starts backing out of the room towards the sliding glass doors). You may want to stock up on tissues before you talk to Jackie. She's a crier. (Turns to open door).  
  
Kitty: That's right Steven. You have helped her through some tough times haven't you?  
  
Eric: Yeah, he has mom. In fact, he's like Jackie's personal cheer up buddy.  
  
Hyde (making a face): Cheer up buddy?  
  
Eric: (shrugs) : Yeah, I know, but it was all I could think of.  
  
Kitty grabs some tissues and hands them to Hyde.  
  
Kitty: You really are a wonderful boy! Jesus loves you!  
  
Red: Well, good. As long as Steven is handling this I can go back to more important issues like eating.  
  
The rest of the family sits back down at the table.  
  
Eric: Hyde, you better get going. I think I hear Jackie and Donna coming up the driveway.  
  
Red: Bye.  
  
Kitty: I'll save your supper.  
  
Hyde opens the door.  
  
Hyde (to himself): Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!  
  
Jackie and Donna are walking up the driveway talking.  
  
Donna: I am really proud of you. You're finally going to handle this engagement thing like an adult.  
  
Jackie: I am an adult, aren't I? I'm just going to march into Eric's basement, sit Michael down, and have a serious talk with him.  
  
Donna: And don't get sidetracked. Yes, Kelso has nice, soft, feathery hair but no, that doesn't mean you should marry him.  
  
Jackie: Right! (Looks up the driveway and sees Hyde) Hi Steven!  
  
Hyde (gives a small wave) Hi Jackie! (It comes out too peppy for Steven Hyde)  
  
Donna (confused): Hey Hyde. You know I'm here too.  
  
Jackie: Yeah, she's kind of hard to miss. How many redheaded giants do you see in Point Place?  
  
Hyde remains silent thinking of what he can say to keep Jackie from crying on his shoulder all night long.  
  
Donna: Umm..anyway. This is feeling kind of weird to me, so I think I'm going to go find Eric now. Jackie can fill me in later. (leaves).  
  
Jackie (noticing the tissues in Hyde's hands): What are all those tissues for?  
  
Not thinking, Hyde thrusts them towards Jackie. Hyde: There for you.  
  
She looks down and Hyde's hands are holding the tissues at the level of her cleavage  
  
Jackie (insulted): Steven Hyde, if you are implying that I stuff my bra you can just go to hell. What you see is completely natural, and totally perfect.  
  
Hyde: No, No.. that's not what I meant (slightly flustered) Yes, of course your breasts are perfect..  
  
Jackie: (gives him a weird look): What???  
  
Hyde: Nothing. Forget it. Let's just go inside.  
  
They walk into the kitchen. Kitty gets up and gives Jackie a hug.  
  
Kitty: Oh you poor dear! You must feel so bad!  
  
Hyde stands behind Jackie, shaking his head "NO" frantically. Only Eric notices.  
  
Eric: Yes, you must feel horrible about how your hair turned out today.  
  
Jackie (shocked): What's wrong with my hair?  
  
Eric: Oh, nothing. I'm sure you meant for it to be so flat.  
  
Kitty: Eric, what are you talking about? I don't think there's anything wrong with her hair.  
  
Jackie: You're the only one! (Runs out of the kitchen and into the living room)  
  
Hyde: I'm sorry. I just couldn't do it. There was too much pressure on me. I'm no good at this being nice crap.  
  
Kitty: Did you really try your best? (Looks doubtful).  
  
Hyde: I really did Mrs. Forman. But somehow we just ended up talking about her cleavage.  
  
Red: Well, that's enough information for me. Look, just go in there like a man and tell your little sweetheart that her father is a common crook.  
  
Hyde: Fine. But she's not my sweetheart.  
  
Kitty: Oh Red-you remember. They had the cutest little date but then for some reason she went back with that Kelso kid.  
  
Red: Who?  
  
Kitty: Michael Kelso. The dumb but pretty one.  
  
Red: Oh, yeah. He's the one who always walks into the glass doors.  
  
They all nod.  
  
Red: I hate him.  
  
Hyde: (takes a deep breath): Ok-I'm going in!  
  
Scene 2-Forman's living room.  
  
Jackie is sitting on the couch looking at her hair in a compact mirror. When she sees Hyde come in, she tucks it away in her purse.  
  
Jackie (sadly): Do you think that my hair looks flat?  
  
Hyde: What? Oh, No. It looks fine. Listen, I need to talk to you.  
  
Jackie: Is it about Michael and the engagement? Because you can save your breath. I'm already going to talk to him about it.  
  
Hyde: No. It's about your dad.  
  
Jackie: My dad?  
  
Hyde (fast): Yeah, Kitty-got-a-call-from-your-maid-and -your-dad's-going-to- jail.  
  
Jackie:Oh my God!  
  
(She leans over and hugs Hyde)  
  
Hyde: Hey, it's no big deal. At least you'll know where he is all the time. I mean, my dad could be anywhere.  
  
Jackie looks up at him with tears in her eyes.  
  
Jackie: Where's Michael?  
  
Hyde: In the basement.  
  
Jackie gets up and leaves.  
  
Hyde (softly): Dammit.  
Scene 3-The Basement  
  
Kelso is sitting on the couch with Jackie on his lap. She is softly crying into his shoulder.  
  
Kelso: Hey babe. It'll be ok. Maybe I could buy you something to take your mind off of it. What do you want? Some clogs? A necklace?  
  
Jackie: I don't want anything.  
  
Kelso (looks worried): Oh..well..we could talk about it.  
  
Hyde walks down the stairs.  
  
Kelso: But...we'll have to wait until Hyde leaves. Damn Hyde! Can't you see we're busy?  
  
Hyde: Oh, sorry man. (He starts to walk back up the stairs).  
  
Kelso: No, No don't leave!! I mean, the moments already ruined.  
  
Hyde shrugs and walks to his usual chair.  
  
Jackie (standing up): Well, I guess I better go call my mom. (Goes upstairs).  
  
Kelso turns to Hyde and sighs.  
  
Hyde picks up a magazine and ignores him. Kelso sighs again louder.  
  
Hyde: I give up. What is it?  
  
Kelso: I don't know what to do about this Jackie thing. We were supposed to talk about our engagement today. How can I call it off with her dad in the slammer?  
  
Hyde: So, you decided to break it off, huh?  
  
Kelso: yeah, I'm just going to tell her -Look babe. I'm hot, Your hot, let's not ruin that by getting married.  
  
Hyde (skeptical): Ok. I guess that will work.  
  
Kelso: Of course it will. I just have to wait until the right time to spring it on her.  
  
Hyde (sarcastic): Yep, that sounds like a great plan. I can't conceive a possible flaw in that idea.  
  
Kelso: Yeah, I think I'm getting smarter everyday.  
  
Hyde: Well, you couldn't possibly be getting any dumber.  
  
Scene 4-Forman's Basement- The next day. Hyde is sitting alone watching TV. Donna enters.  
  
Donna: Hey. What are you watching?  
  
Hyde quickly gets up and turns off the TV.  
  
Hyde: Nothing.  
  
Donna: It was Little House on the Prairie again, wasn't it?  
  
Hyde: Maybe. Hey, why don't you and Forman go pick out China patterns or whatever it is you two do together?  
  
Donna: Wow. Someone's unusually bitter. Oh wait- you're Hyde- your always bitter.  
  
Hyde: Ha Ha. Forman really is a lucky man to have snatched you up.  
  
Donna: Yeah, I know. Hey, what was the story with you and Jackie yesterday?  
  
Hyde: What do you mean? I just felt weird about having to tell her that her dad was on his way to the Big House.  
  
Donna: Maybe..  
  
Hyde: Maybe what? Look, if you've got something to say, spit it out.  
  
Donna: I just find it interesting that everything Jackie has a problem you just happen to have a shoulder for her to cry on.  
  
Hyde: You can just stop right there with whatever creepy, unnatural thought you were about to have. I am a humanitarian. That's it.  
  
Donna (rolls her eyes): Oh yeah. You're a regular Mother Theresa.  
  
Hyde: I helped Kelso with his problem the other day too. What creepy thoughts do you have on that?  
  
Donna: Hmm..That's interesting. What was his problem?  
  
Hyde: I don't know. Something Kelso-like. Which of course means something too dumb to remember.  
  
Donna: I wonder if it had something to do with him and Jackie.  
  
Hyde: Nope. It didn't. I guess your little theory is off.  
  
Donna: I guess so. But I really thought that maybe Kelso was nervous about having gotten engaged, and maybe instead of just letting him ignore those thoughts for a few months until he cheated on our girl Jackie to avoid tying the knot-you encouraged him to think about it, and maybe even break it off.  
  
Hyde: He came up with that himself! I mean, nope. It never happened.  
  
Donna: Whatever. (Laughs) You're so deep in denial that I think you actually have yourself convinced that you hate her.  
  
Hyde: I don't know who your talking about, and I do hate her. With a passion.  
  
Donna: (gets up) Ok, Fine. I'm done with my little rant. But just to let you know- she's planning on ending it with Kelso for good.  
  
Hyde shrugs and turns back on the TV  
  
Hyde: Don't care.  
  
Donna leaves  
Scene 5--Forman's Living room  
  
Kitty and Jackie are talking on the couch.  
  
Kitty: I'm sure your mother will come home soon. Who would abandon their child?  
  
She looks up and sees Hyde coming down the steps.  
  
Kitty (looks uncomfortable): I'm going to bake you two a cake. You deserve it! (Goes into the kitchen). Hyde sits down next to Jackie.  
  
Hyde: So I guess we're the two charity cases.  
  
Jackie doesn't look at him.  
  
Jackie: I guess.  
  
Hyde: It could be worse. We do get cake out of it.  
  
Jackie smiles.  
  
Jackie: I hope it's chocolate.  
  
Hyde: You can count on it. Who could give anything less to an orphan and a jailbird's daughter?  
  
Jackie: You know, you could be a little more sensitive.  
  
Hyde: True. But then I wouldn't be me, would I?  
  
Jackie: I guess not.  
  
Suddenly, she leans over and hugs him.  
  
Hyde (uncomfortable with the sudden hug): So, umm.you and Kelso are done, huh?  
  
Jackie: What?  
  
Hyde: You and Kelso broke up right? Or did you just end the engagement? (Confused).  
  
Jackie: Neither. Why? What did he tell you?  
  
Hyde stands up.  
  
Hyde: Nothing. What's that? (Backing up towards the kitchen) Ok, Mrs. Forman. I'll be right there. Runs into the kitchen. Jackie turns and leaves out the front door.  
  
Scene 6-Forman's Driveway. Donna and Eric are playing basketball in the driveway. Donna easily scores a basket.  
Donna: What's that? Like 20 to 2?  
  
Eric: NO!! (Pauses) Actually it's 24 to 2. But I'm making a slow comeback.  
  
Hyde walks up the driveway laughing.  
  
Hyde: Good to see the little woman keeping you in your place.  
  
Eric: Oh, really. Hmm..That's funny. Because somebody else's little woman seems to be able to keep you in yours.  
  
Hyde: Not this crap again. (Turns to Donna) What have you been telling him? You know he'll believe anything.  
  
Eric: She hasn't been telling me anything. Especially nothing about your disturbing crush on one of the devil's dominions.  
  
Hyde: Shut up. Your girl has a wild imagination.  
  
Eric: Yeah, that's what I thought at first too. But then I started thinking, and it all made sense. Do you wanna know what I think?  
  
Hyde: Not really.  
  
Eric: I think you like being Jackie's personal cheer up buddy!  
  
Donna: What the hell's a cheer up buddy?  
  
Eric: Don't worry about it. All that matters is that Hyde likes being Jackie's.  
  
Hyde: Forget you two. I'm outta here. Hyde starts to walk towards the kitchen.  
  
Donna: She's in the Basement! Donna and Eric laugh as Hyde enters the kitchen.  
Scene 7-The Basement  
  
Hyde is walking down the steps. Jackie is alone on the couch.  
  
Hyde (to himself): I'm just going to my room. I'm allowed to do that. Screw Eric and Donna.  
  
Jackie: Steven, is that you?  
  
Hyde: Hey Jackie. I didn't know you were here. I'm just going to go to my room and get some shut eye. I'm beat.  
  
He starts to walk to his room.  
  
Jackie (sadly): Oh, ok.  
  
Hyde stops but doesn't turn around  
  
Hyde: What is it?  
  
Jackie: After we talked, I went to see Michael. I know he talked to you about ending our engagement.  
  
Hyde: Did he? It must have slipped my mind.  
  
Hyde turns around and goes to sit in his usual chair.  
  
Jackie: It's ok. I had talked to Donna about he same thing.  
  
Hyde: So it all worked out then? He dumps you, you dump him. Everything's great.  
  
Jackie: Not exactly. He only wanted to break off the engagement but I wanted to break up for good.  
  
Hyde (suddenly interested): What did you do?  
  
Jackie: I ended it. Who does that jerk think he is? He won't marry me, but he thinks I'll still be his girlfriend!  
  
Hyde: (sarcastic) Oh yeah. What a jerk. (Serious) I mean, you didn't want to marry him either.  
  
Jackie: That's just details Steven! Anyway, so now I'm alone. My dad's gone, and Michael's gone. I don't know what to do.  
  
Jackie's eyes begin to fill up with tears.  
  
Hyde (sighs heavily): Look, I thought this would happen. From the moment Mrs. Forman told me to talk to you- I knew it would lead o this.  
  
Jackie (angry): Well, I'm so sorry if my ruined life is inconviencing you!  
  
Hyde: No, I didn't mean it like that. I just meant.(digs into his pocket) Here.  
  
Jackie: What's this? Jackie takes the ring from Hyde's hand.  
  
Hyde: I just thought that since gifts are the only thing that cheers you up- I'd better buy you something. And since I'm cheap- this was all I could think of.  
  
Jackie tries the ring on her finger.  
  
Jackie: It's too small.  
  
Hyde: That's the genius of a 25-cent ring. It's adjustable.  
  
Hyde takes the ring and pulls it open wider. He slips it easily on to her finger.  
  
Hyde: Yeah, it's pretty lame, I know. But it's easier than spending all night with you crying on my shoulder. I have things to do, you know. I'm a busy guy.  
  
Jackie: It's perfect. Thank you.  
  
She leans in to hug him, and softly starts to cry.  
  
Hyde: No! Didn't you hear me? The ring was suppose to stop this!!! (He gives in and loosely wraps his arm around her.)  
  
Hyde (shakes his head and sighs): What a waste of a perfectly good quarter.  
  
(A small smile spreads across his face as Jackie continues to hug him).  
  
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No Fez in this chapter. Sorry. I didn't mean to do that but I guess I just forgot him in my attempt to add J/H goodness. The next chapter will be up soon and I think it will deal heavily with J/K/H/ and the now complicated situation that is arising. Please R/R. Thanks! 


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: I was going to have this chapter be longer, but I decided to break it up into a pre-party chapter and a party one.  I know there is a little drama at the end of the chapter and I hope Donna and Jackie aren't too OOC  but I just needed a little show down to recap the issues  before the party. I promise that the next chapter will have no drama (well, I can't promise that. I mean, it is Jackie and Hyde's date!!!!) 

Please Review! I love feedback! Thanks so much to all of my kind reviewers

P.S. Sometimes FF.net messes with my word groupings. Sorry about that!

Chapter 4

**Scene 1**

**Donna's Bedroom**

**Donna and Jackie are on the bed talking.**

Donna: So, I think I'm going to throw a party for Fez's birthday.

Jackie: It's Fez's birthday? Wow. I didn't know foreigners had them.

Donna: Of course they do! And Fez's is on Saturday!

Jackie: What makes you want to throw him a party this year? I mean, we've managed to ignore it for the past 4 years….

Donna: I know and I feel bad. Look, Fez never gets the girl, never gets a party (thinks about it ) In fact, he never gets anything but candy. I want to make it up to him.

Jackie: Wait. Something happened. You wouldn't just be thinking about Fez this much for no reason. Wait…do you have a crush on him?

Donna: Jackie! I love Eric!

Jackie: Yeah, Yeah I know. But I can dream that it's just a skinny boy-loving phase, can't I?

Donna hits her on the shoulder

Donna: Shut up. It's just that Kate broke up with Fez.

Jackie: Whose Kate? Wait, is she one of those skanks that hangs at the Hub?

Donna: No..remember? She's that freshman girl I set Fez up with.

Jackie: Oh, the weird one that used to stalk Eric!

Donna: Yeah, she dumped him. I guess he just wasn't stalker material. 

Jackie: Poor guy! Hey you know what? We should do something for him!

Donna (sarcastic): Like throwing him a birthday party?

Jackie: That's a great idea. I'm so glad I thought of it.

Donna: But Jackie, you didn't….

Jackie just stares at her

Donna: Forget it! You thought of it! What a brilliant idea!

Jackie: Thanks. I'm pretty proud of myself.

Scene 2 

**Basement- Donna and Eric are sitting on the couch. Kelso is sitting on the lawn chair staring at them.**

Eric: I think you are the sweetest girl ever to throw Fez a party!

Donna: Thank you Eric. You know, you're  pretty sweet yourself.

Eric:No, No. You're the sweet one!

Donna:No you!

Eric: No you!

Kelso: SHUT UP!

Eric and Donna turn and stare at Kelso.

Eric: Kelso man, what's your problem?

Kelso: I just can't take all of your being happy and in love crap right now!

Donna:I'm sorry. You really miss Jackie, huh?

Kelso: Yeah, you know if I had know that she was going to dump me-I would have dumped her first!!

Eric: Hindsight is 20/20 , my friend.

Donna: Kelso, you didn't want to marry her, so why did you want to keep dating her?

Kelso: I don't know. She's hot, and she puts out, and we look good together.

Donna: Those are some of the worst reasons for staying together that I have ever heard!

Kelso: Hmm…….maybe you're right….

Donna: Thank God, you finally understand how wrong your relationship with Jackie was! I mean, how may times can two people breakup before they call it quits?

Kelso (silently thinking) I see your point my red-headed friend, but I'm still going to have to try to win her back!

Eric:What!?!?

Kelso: That's right. I'm going to get Jackie back. Love is a game my friends and Michael Kelso never loses at games!

Eric: What about checkers?

Donna:And monopoly?

Eric:Don't forget chess.

Kelso: Ok, fine. Love is a contact sport and Michael Kelso always wins at contact sports.

Eric: Except hockey. You always fall down on your skates.

Donna: And football. You always quit after the first person tackles you.

Kelso: That's because Hyde always goes for my eye!(pauses) Oh, forget you guys! I'm going to get a REAL friend to help me with my "Win Jackie Back" plan!

Eric: Like who?

Hyde emerges from his bedroom 

Kelso (sees Hyde): Like Hyde!

Hyde: Oh, no. I heard my name in one of Kelso's sentences. That can't be good.

Hyde sits in his usual chair.

Kelso: I was just saying what a handsome, classy man you are and………..Damn it! I give it! I can't complement you when you look like that!

Hyde: In about 3 seconds I'm going to punch you, so if you have a point, I'd make it fast.

Kelso: Fine. I want to win Jackie back and you're the only one who can help me.

Hyde:Why me?

Kelso (matter-of-factly): Because Fez isn't here and Eric and Donna are making fun of me!

Hyde (sarcastic): Really! Ok then! Let's get started!

Kelso: Gee, thanks Hyde!

Hyde: Kelso, I was kidding. I wouldn't help you with this plan if my life depended on it!

Donna sits up and looks at Kelso.

Donna: You know. Maybe I will help you with this plan.

Eric (whispers to Donna): Donna, what are you doing?

Donna waves him off.

Donna: You know what you should do? You should get Hyde to ask Jackie out.

All 3 of the boys: WHAT?????

Donna (looking at kelso): Well, Hyde is everything your not. He's hairy, mean, and most importantly a total jerk to Jackie.

Eric (laughing to himself): Not always…

Donna hits him to shut him up.

Donna: One date with Hyde, and Jackie will be running back to her sweet, charming Michael.

Kelso:I'm not sure I understand, but it involves Hyde being a jerk- so I'm in!

Hyde: Well, I'm out. I don't like fake dates, and I don't like Jackie.

Donna: That's why it's so perfect. If you don't ask her out, than some great guy might and she'll never go back  to Kelso.

Hyde: I'll have you know, I'm considered a pretty good catch.

Eric: Yep, a broke, pot-smoking, teenager. What a catch!

Hyde punches Eric's arm.

Kelso: C'mon Hyde! You have to do it! I'm really messed up over this breakup!

Eric: Yeah, he's so messed up that I saw him making out with Pam Macy in the Gym today.

Kelso:Well, I have to keep myself occupied! 

Donna (looks directly at Hyde): I mean, the only problem would be if you actually liked Jackie. You don't LIKE JACKIE, do you?

Hyde stares back uncomfortably.

Hyde (Pauses): No.

Donna: Fine, then it's settled. Hyde will ask Jackie to with him to Fez's party on Saturday.

Kelso (stands up): Great. I'm going to go ask Pam to come along.

Eric: What the hell? How is having Pam Macy there going to help you win Jackie back?

Kelso: It will either make Jackie jealous, or give me some hot action if it doesn't. (He shrugs) Either way….

Kelso leaves.

Hyde (turns to Donna): I know what your doing and it's not going to work. This isn't some crappy movie where the scrappy underdog protects the princess from the evil dufus.

Donna: I didn't say it was. I just want to help my friends out.

Hyde leaves.

Eric: Donna, why did you do that? Screwing with this whole Jackie love triangle is a bad, bad, bad idea!

Donna: Look, I'm just so sick of Jackie and Kelso's horrible relationship. They shouldn't be together and everyone knows it. So, if my plan stops them from getting back together by getting Hyde to admit his true feelings, than where's the harm?

Eric: The harm's everywhere! Kelso is going to be pissed, Hyde is going to be pissed, and Jackie….well, who knows what Jackie will be….probably trying to decided what shade of lipstick is best for ruining manhoods.

Donna: Everything is to be fine. Just trust me, ok?

Eric: Fine. But I'm not helping you mess with our friends.

Donna looks sad and pouts.

Donna: Please my Eric bear!

Eric (sighs): Ok. But not because of your cute pouty lips. It's because I just so happen to like destroying my best friends' lives.

Donna (hugs him): Thank You!

Scene 3 

**The Next day**

Forman's Kitchen 

**Kitty is preparing dinner as Fez walks in.**

Fez (sad) :Oh hello , Miss Kitty.

Kitty: Hi dear. The boys are in the basement.

Fez sits down at the table.

Fez (sighs): I know. I just don't think I can go down there.

Kitty (sits down next to him ): Why sweetie? What's the matter?

Fez: Oh, Miss Kitty, it is horrible! My girlfriend broke up with me, and my birthday is in three days and I'm sure my friends have forgotten again!

Kitty: There, There- you poor dear. How about some brownies?

Kitty gets up and cuts him a piece .

Fez: My heart is too heavy to eat any brownies. Unless of course, they are special brownies

Kitty (laughs): Of course they are!

Fez looks excited.

Kitty: I made them with love!

Fez goes back to looking sad.

Kitty places the plate of brownies in front of him, and Fez pushes it away.

Kitty: Oh my! This is serious, isn't it? You never refuse chocolate.

Kitty thinks for a moment.

Kitty: Well, maybe if I told you a secret it would cheer you up.

Fez: Is it about Eric and his stuffed animal collection? Because I already know about hat, and it won't be as funny the second time around (thinks about it and starts to laugh) Who am I kidding? Yes it is!

Kitty: Um..no. It's about somebody's big day!!

Fez: The day I lose my virginity!

Kitty: No, and that's not kitchen talk young man! It's about your birthday.

Fez (claps) Yeah! What is it? You must tell Fez!

Kitty: Alright, but I'm only telling you this to cheer you up. I am usually very good at keeping secrets.

Kitty leans in and whispers to Fez. He smiles wide.

SCENE 4 

**The basement**

**Kelso is sitting on the lawn chair. Donna and Eric are on the couch, and Hyde is sitting in his usual chair.**

Kelso: Ok Hyde. You can't back out now. When Jackie comes over here, you have to ask her out

Donna: Yeah Hyde, it is what any good, non-Jackie loving friend would do.

Hyde: Oh, don't worry. I'll ask her out. No problem.

Kelso: I'm so excited. This is like the time I saw my first Playboy.

Everyone looks at him.

Kelso: Except with out the naked women.

Eric: So, anyway. What's with the sudden change in attitude, Hyde?

Hyde: Oh, I just realized how much fun it's going to be. You know, I think may be Donna is right, dating a jerk like me will send Jackie running back to the King of Idiots.

Kelso: Thanks Hyde.

Donna: What? So now you agree with me?

Hyde: Yep, in fact I've come up with a list of things that I can do to be extra crude while on my date.

Kelso: I like the sound of that! What are they?

Hyde (clears throat): Tell Jackie she looks fat. Spill punch on her dress, make fun of Donny Osmund, grab her ass, hit on Pam Macy….(looks at Donna) You get the idea.

Kelso: Man that is going to piss her off royally! She's as good as mine.

Eric: You wouldn't really do that Hyde, would you?

Hyde: Oh, I would. Unless of course you guys think this date is a bad idea and we should call it off.

Hyde and Donna lock eyes.

Donna: No, I think it's still a great idea. I mean, if you want to break Jackie's heart and have her run back to Kelso for the rest of her life, I can't stop you.

Hyde: Hey, I just want to help my man Kelso out. I'll do whatever I have to do.

Donna: Great.

Hyde: Fine.

Donna: OK.

Hyde: Great.

Donna: I already said that.

Kelso: Hey, what's going on? Am I missing something?

Eric (points to the T.V.): Hey look. Jeanie's half-naked!

Kelso turns to the T.V. and goes into a daze.

Kelso: Man, this is good writing!

The door opens and Jackie walks in.

Jackie: Hey guys. (She sits on the edge of the couch.)

Kelso: Hey Jackie How-are-you?

Jackie: Ok. Why are you looking at me like that?

Kelso: No reason, it's just that…..um…..HYDE!

Jackie turns to Hyde.

Hyde: Jackie, you know, since Fez's party is Saturday and all…

Jackie: Yes?

Hyde: Screw it! Do you want to go to the party with me?

Donna nudges Eric.

Eric: Oh, and Kelso is going with Pam Macy!

Jackie looks from Hyde to Kelso.

Kelso: That's right. I am so over you! As long as you're over me.

Jackie (thinks for a second): Ok, Steven. Why not?

Hyde: Cool.

Everyone remains silent for a moment. Fez comes bouncing down the stairs.

Fez: Hello all of my beautiful American Friends!

Donna: What has gotten into you?

Fez: Oh, nothing. I am just so lucky to have such thoughtful friends.

Eric: Thoughtful?

Fez: Did I say thoughtful? No, I meant selfish. Yes, I am lucky to have such wonderfully selfish friends! (He smiles wide at all of them).

Donna: You know huh? Thanks a lot Jackie!

Jackie: Hey! It wasn't me! It was probably Eric. He loves to gossip.

Eric: Do not! (Pauses)  Ok, occasionally, but only if it's really juicy

Fez: It doesn't matter who told me. All that matters is that you love me

Donna: Yes, it does matter who told you! I have to kick their ass!

Fez: Ok….fine…….it was (He points up)

Kelso: God! Oh, Donna, you so cannot kick God's ass!

Fez: No, you idiot! It was Miss Kitty! But she only did it to cheer me up, and it did. I have never had a surprise party before!

Hyde: Well, now it's just a party.

Fez: But you'll still yell  "surprise", right?

Eric: No way.

Donna: Yes you will! The party will still be a surprise if Fez wants it that way! No one is going to ruin this for me…I mean him. C'mon Jackie. Let's go buy some balloons.

The girls leave.

Fez sits on the couch.

Fez: A  surprise party for me!

Eric: Well, you missed the biggest surprise of all. Hyde is taking Jackie to your party.

Hyde: It's just to get her to go back with Kelso.

Fez: Eww………why would you want to have her do that?

Kelso glares at Fez.

Kelso: HEY!

Fez (tries to smile at Kelso): I mean, good idea! Let me know what I can do to help!

SCENE 5 FRIDAY AFTERNOON 

**DONNA'S HOUSE**

**Donna and Jackie are making a cake for the party.**

Donna: So, tomorrow's the big day!

Jackie: Yeah, Fez turns 18! How can someone so old like candy so much?

Donna: No, I'm talking about your date with Hyde!

Jackie: It's no big deal.

Donna: But Jackie, it is.

Jackie: No, Donna, it isn't. Whenever Michael is an ass to me, Steven always takes care of me. Remember when I caught Michael kissing Laurie? Steven started hanging out with me to get me through it. It's just like that.

Donna: But this is a real date.

Jackie: Steven and I already tried that and (looks sad) No fireworks! Nothing! We're just friends.

Donna: I think you're wrong. I think you're more than that, which is why I wanted to tell you something.

Jackie: What is it?

Donna: Hyde might be mean to you tomorrow. I don't think he will. I think he was only bluffing, but he might be.

Jackie: What are you talking about? 

Donna: Kelso wants Hyde to be a jerk to you so you'll want him back.

Jackie: Why would Steven go along with that? He knows Michael and I are done for good.

Donna: I think he was embarrassed because Eric and I have been teasing him about having a crush on you. I think he wants to show us how wrong we are by pretending to hate you.

Jackie: (looks confused): I don't understand. Why did he ask me out in the first place?

Donna: I kind-of encouraged him to. I was pretending it would help Kelso, but really I just wanted you two to go on a real date and see what all of this sexual tension between you is really about.

Jackie (angry): I can't believe you would do this! You just can't play with people's hearts like this!

Donna: I know! I was just trying to help!

Jackie: Look, just stay out of my love life, ok? Did it ever occur to you that maybe I had given up all of my feelings for Steven a long time ago? That maybe that Veterans Day kiss had meant everything to me, but nothing to him? Why would you want my heart to get broken by him again?

Donna: I don't! I think you both are just too busy hiding your feelings to just be together! I think if you both had been honest about that kiss, than you would be together  today.

Jackie: No, you're wrong. Steven didn't feel anything and that's ok. I move don a long time ago. We're just friends and that's it. So please- stop butting in.

Jackie grabs her coat and heads towards the door.

Jackie: You'll see tomorrow. Steven and I could never happen.

She leaves.

Donna: We'll see…

**Please r/r! Thank you!**


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Again, I don't own anything or anyone. Especially not Pam Macy- because she's just gross! 

A/N: I have no idea how this chapter turned out this way. I had about 3 different versions at one point, and then it all came out like this. I've realized how hard it is to write Hyde as sweet and in character. It's a lot easier to just have him in turmoil. I just figured that Hyde would probably fight his feelings as long as he can-so that's what this chapter is really about. But Hyde's only human-he can't fight love forever J

P.S.: Thank you to my most recent reviewers! It's so nice to get feedback. I appreciate it and it encourages me to keep writing! Also, I wanted to say that all of the T7S fics on here are great, and I just want to thank all of the FF. net writers for their brilliant work!

Scene 1 

**Hyde's bedroom**

**Hyde is sitting on his bed, flipping through a magazine when Jackie walks in.**

_Jackie: I know what your up to, and it's not going to work, Steven.._

_Hyde: Oh, really? And just what am I up to? _

_Jackie: Give me a break. You know what I'm talking about._

_Hyde (sighs): I'm assuming your talking about the party tonight. Great. You got me. I'm helping Kelso with his idiotic scheme. So sue me._

_Jackie: How could you? You know I don't want him back. In fact, I don't even want him to try to get me back._

_Hyde: Really? You usually love a good round of Kelso groveling._

_Jackie: Well, I'm over it. _

_Hyde: And it only took you four years. Good for you!  _

_Jackie: Don't you even wanna know, why I'm over it?_

_Hyde: I give up. Why?_

_Jackie leans over and kisses him._

_Jackie: Because of you._

Hyde stirs in his bed and wakes up. He blinks his eyes for a minute realizing what happened.

Hyde: Crap!

Scene 2 

**Donna's living room. Donna and Eric are decorating for the party.**

Donna: So, do you think Jackie's going to hate me forever?

Eric: Nope

Donna: How can you be so sure?

Eric: Because every single time I think Jackie is gone from my life-she conveniently fixes the problem and shows up in the basement again.

Donna: Yeah, but that was always over some Kelso problem. This is different.

Eric: Why? Because it's Hyde. Big deal. You arranged a stupid fake date with him and Jackie.

Donna: You don't understand. Jackie really likes him. And Hyde really likes her. They just completely refuse to admit it. (Pauses) I just didn't think she felt so bad after their last date.

Eric: Why should she feel bad? She's the one who told Hyde his kiss wasn't anything special.

Donna: I know but…wait….how did you know that?

Eric: Know what? I don't know anything. And you can't force it out of me, ok? I don't have to tell you anything little lady.

Donna: Oh, but I think you do. 

Donna grabs him and punches his arm.

Eric: You know, that actually hurt me. 

He rubs his arm 

Eric: And not just on the outside!!

He smiles and puts his hand over his heart. 

Donna: Stop goofing around and spill it Forman.

Eric: Fine. A few months, I asked our little friend Hyde how is freaky date with Jackie was. You know, this was after her and Kelso got back together. (Pause) He never talked about it, and I just started wondering what the hell could have happened?

Donna: And he actually told you?

Eric: Of course he did! I am his best friend!

Donna gives him weird look.

Eric: Ok, fine. We were pretty drunk, but what does that matter, really?

Donna: Can we speed this story along alittle bit?

Eric: Right. So I started teasing him about how he punched out Chip and took Jackie on a romantic date. It was just something to burn him about. He's always saying I'm whipped by you. It was the only time I can remember him being sweet to a girl. Anyway, he said it didn't really matter what had happened on the date and that he didn't he remember it really. (Pause) Except that they kissed and she felt nothing.

Donna: He just came out and told you that?

Eric: Yeah, he said she felt nothing and then they went home.

Donna: Eric, listen very carefully, did Hyde say he felt something?

Eric : (thinking): I don't know. We were hammered. I think after that Fez threw up in my lap. I sort-of had other things to worry about.

Donna:  You know what. Those two are perfect for each other.  They're both insane! 

Eric: Oh, insanity. What better thing to bring a couple together?

Donna: Yep, it's what attracted me to you.

Eric: HA HA HA. (He playfully shoves her arm)

Donna (mimicking Eric): That hurt on the inside!!!! 

Scene 3 

Kelso is sitting on the couch when Hyde walks out of his room.

Kelso: Are you ready for the big night?

Hyde: Kelso, this is not a big night. A big night is doing it with a blonde that has a huge rack. Not taking a small, whiny brunette to Fez's party.

Kelso: I see your point. But I'm kind of nervous anyway. You know, this could be my last chance to win Jackie back.

Hyde: Do you really think this will work? 

Kelso: As long as you keep insulting her--it will.

Kelso twirls around 

Kelso: How do I look?

Hyde: I refuse to answer that.

Kelso: C'mon Hyde.  I have to look like a total babe tonight.

Hyde: Fine. (Thinks) Your pants definitely say "I'll never bang whores again".

Kelso: Perfect! That's exactly the look I'm going for. Unless of course, Jackie rejects me- then I want my pants to tell Pam Macy that I'm open for business! 

The door opens and Fez walks in.

Fez: (to Kelso): Sharp pants.

Kelso: Thanks. Hyde thought so too.

Hyde: I did not! I don't look at other guys pants! I was just (Pauses) Forget it.

Kelso: So, Fez, are you ready for your hot date with Pam's cousin?

Fez: Oh, yes, I am so excited! I can only hope that she is even half as slutty as Pam Macy is! Then it will be a very happy birthday for Fez!

Hyde: There's going to be two Macy's at the party to tonight? Can Donna's house take that much trash?

Fez: I can only hope so!

Kelso (Turns to Fez): C'mon. Let's go get our women.

Fez: (Excited): I have a woman to get!

Fez and Kelso leave. Hyde sits down in his usual chair. The door opens and Jackie walks in.

Jackie: Hi.

Hyde: Hey.

Jackie: So… (Pauses): You look nice.

Hyde looks down at his Led Zeppelin t-shirt.

Hyde: Really? Cause I was thinking about going with my Aerosmith t-shirt. Nothing says class like a few holes in the armpit.

Jackie: I think you made the right choice.

Hyde: Yeah, well, you don't look too horrible yourself. I mean, I've seen worse. 

Jackie: I guess I should take that as a compliment.

The door opens and Kelso walks in not noticing Jackie.

Kelso: I forgot my coat. (He reaches over to the record player and grabs his coat. He turns and sees Jackie.) Hey Jackie. How's your date with Hyde coming along? (He smirks).

Jackie (annoyed): Fine. But shouldn't you be out getting VD from that skank that you're bringing to Fez's party by now?

Kelso: Yeah…well…..HYDE!

Hyde just looks at him.

Kelso (coughs):HYDE!

Jackie and Kelso stare at Hyde –waiting for him to speak.

Hyde (to Jackie): Yeah, so, is it just me or does that skirt make your ass look huge?

Kelso: Damn, Hyde! That was cold! Jackie, I think your butt looks great tonight.

Jackie: Whatever. 

Kelso: Huh? Man, Hyde's burns must be getting pretty weak if you don't even care about them. 

Hyde: Did I say your butt looked big? Cause what I meant was it's in perfect proportion to the rest of you.

Kelso and Jackie just look at Hyde.

Hyde: I was just thrown off by the fact that you're bigger on a whole. So don't worry, your butt is just as fat as the rest of you.

Kelso: Ouch! Jackie, I would totally understand if you wanted to dump this jerk and have me escort you to the party.

Jackie: No thanks. I don't need to have Pam Macy's sloppy seconds. (Pause) Besides, maybe Hyde's right. I think I may have gained a pound or two.

Kelso: Man, I'm getting outta here. This place is like the twilight zone. The next thing you know, Hyde will decide he's a republican.

Kelso storms out.

Jackie: That was a great little show you put on.

Hyde: I don't know what you're talking about.

Jackie: You can drop the act. I know about your little scheme. Do you really think I would believe anyone would call my butt anything but perfect?

Hyde (smiles): Guess not. But you should know, this was everyone else's fault but mine. I'd say the blame lies in descending order from Donna to Kelso and even Forman. I just got dragged into it.

Jackie: Well, then I'll do you a favor and let you off the hook.

Hyde: Really?  No date?

Jackie: Yep. It's not like your little plan would have worked anyway. There's nothing anyone could do to make me run back to Michael.

Hyde: Yeah, I've heard that before.

Jackie: This time I'm serious. (Jackie starts to walk towards the door) I'm perfectly capable of getting my own dates, you know. I don't need fake ones. 

Hyde: Hey, I don't need to go on any phony dates myself.

Jackie: Good. Then if you'll excuse me- I have to go get dressed for my real date. See you at the party.  

Hyde (Confused): Yeah, see you.   

Jackie leaves.

Hyde grabs his coat and runs up the steps into the kitchen.

Kitty: Oh, honey, shouldn't you be getting ready for your big date?

Hyde: I am ready.

Kitty (laughs): Of course you are! And you look so handsome!

Hyde: I gotta run Mrs. Forman. I have to go find a date at the Hub.

Kitty: Find a date?

Hyde: I mean, meet my date at the Hub. Don't worry, it's cool. 

He kisses her on the cheek and hurriedly leaves through the sliding doors.

Scene 4-Donna's Living Room.

Donna and Eric are standing by the snack table.

Donna (looks around at the few people gathered there): We really need to get some more friends.

Eric: Hey. I brought the unofficial Stars Wars club, so don't blame me.

Eric waves to four nerdy looking guys.

Nerdy Guy #1: May the force be with your friend Fez on this happy occasion!

Donna (rolls her eyes): Yeah, they really are the life of the party.

Eric: Well, look who you brought. They've been fighting with Jackie's friends for a half-hour!

They look over at two girls arguing with three cheerleaders.

Donna: Well, Diane and Allison do have a point.

Diane: Cheerleading is just another example of female objectification in a male dominated society!

Cheerleader #1: Whatever. The uniforms are cute.

Cheerleader #2: And the football guys only date cheerleaders.

Allison: I can see we have a lot of work to do.

The camera pans back to Eric and Donna.

Eric: Yep, that's fun party talk if I ever heard it! 

Donna: Shut up! Where the hell are Hyde and Jackie? Fez is going to be here any minute.

Just then the doorbell rings and everyone scatters to jump out and yell "Surprise".

Donna: False alarm guys! I'm sure it's just Hyde and Jackie.

Donna opens the door.

Donna: Where have you dillholes been?

Fez: In my country we do not call the guest of honor names at their party.

Kelso: Welcome to America man. We call each other names all the time! 

Kelso, Fez, and the two Macy girls walk in.

Eric runs up to them.

Eric: So, SURPRISE!

Fez: The moment is over.

Eric (shrugs): I thought it might be.

Donna: Have you guys seen Hyde and Jackie?

Kelso: I saw them in the basement. Hyde was ripping on Jackie and the weird thing was-she didn't care!

Donna: Hyde was really insulting Jackie? I can't believe it. What an ass.

Kelso: Wasn't that what he was suppose to do? That was the whole plan, Big D!

The doorbell rings.

Donna: I'm going to kill him!

She opens it to reveal Jackie and another guy.

Jackie: Hey Donna. Do you know my date, Matt Bonner?

Matt: Hey.

Fez: Oh, Matt Bonner! Who doesn't know him? He is only the captain of the baseball team, and the class president!

Jackie (smiling): Yeah, he is, isn't he?

She smiles and walks over to the snack table with Matt.

Donna: Umm…Jackie, do you want a beer?

Jackie: No, I'm fine.

Donna: I REALLY think you should get a beer in the kitchen with me.

Jackie: O.K.

They walk into the kitchen.

Donna opens the fridge and hands her two beers.

Donna: what are you doing with that Matt guy?

Jackie: Climbing the high school social ladder if nothing else.

Donna: No, I mean, where is Hyde?

Jackie: Don't know. Don't care.

Donna: Cut out the bullshit. What happened to your date?

Jackie: Well, he tried to burn me but I acted like I didn't care. Then I told him I knew about everything and that he was off the hook for the whole date thing. He looked relieved really. So I called up Matt and he agreed to come with me. I can't have everyone thinking I can't get my own date, can I?

Donna: And by everyone-do you mean Hyde?

Jackie: Please, don't start with this again. I just want to have a good time with a cute guy who actually likes me.

Donna: That's all I was trying to help you do!

Jackie ignores her comment, and walks back out into the living room. She looks at the front door to see Hyde and another girl walking in. Jackie turns to Donna as she walks back into the living room too.

Jackie: First you have two Macys here and now some slut Steven brought. Your house is going to get a bad reputation.

Donna: I don't think my house really cares that much.

Jackie: Fine, but don't come crying to me when this is known as the Pinchotti's Busty Brothel!

Jackie storms over to Matt who is sitting on the couch.

Hyde approaches Donna.

Donna: Hey, Who's your lady friend?

Hyde: Oh, that's Mandy. Pretty hot, huh?

Donna: Yeah, she's great. It looks like you and Jackie have found perfect dates for tonight.

Hyde: Did Jackie bring a date? I hadn't noticed. 

Hyde's eyes glance towards the couch.

Donna: Whatever you say. I'm getting myself out of this lame soap opera before I get in trouble.

Hyde: No soap opera. No trouble. Just beer and hot Mandy- who I should be getting back to before Kelso gets drool on her. 

Hyde goes back over to his date. 

Eric walks out of the kitchen with a birthday cake.

Eric: C'mon guys. Let's do the whole Happy Birthday thing!

Everyone but Hyde and Matt crowd around Eric, Fez and the cake.

Fez: I hope my wish comes true!

Fez blows out the candles and looks at Jackie and Donna.

Fez: They are not kissing! Stupid candles!

Jackie and Donna cut the cake and hand out pieces.

Meanwhile…..

Hyde sits down on a chair next to the couch.

Matt: Hey. 

Hyde: Hey. You look really familiar.

Matt: Yeah. I am senior class president.

Hyde: No, that's not it.

Matt: You a big a baseball fan? I'm captain of the team.

Hyde: High school sports fan? Yeah right….(Pause) Wait….didn't I beat you up last year for trying to hit on Donna?

Matt (embarrassed): Oh, right. Look, I didn't know that Forman and her had just broken up. But I think enough time has passed, don't you?

Hyde: What?

Matt: You know, it's been over a year since the breakup. It's cool if I move in, right?

Hyde: Break up? I think you're a little confused.

Matt: But Jackie said….

Hyde:  What exactly did she say?

Matt: She knows I've had a thing for Donna for a while, and she told me if I came to this party with her she'd try and fix us up. The only catch was that I had to pretend to be her date. She said Donna's one of those girls who likes to go after other people's men.

Hyde: Oh, yeah that's Donna. She's quite the vixen. That whole loving the neighbor boy since the beginning of time thing is just an act. Deep down, she's after everyone's dates.

Matt: Hey, whatever she's into. As long as she's single.

Hyde: Funny you should mention that. Have you taken any time to look Donna's way tonight? 

Matt: Yeah. She's gorgeous, I've been staring at her since I got her.

 Hyde: Hasn't the kissing Eric thing tipped you off to the fact that they're together?

Matt: Oh, I asked Jackie about that. You know, I had my doubts because I had seen them holding hands in the hallway at school, and then kissing here. But she said Donna just likes to keep Eric around as back up. Just incase no one else is around. And Eric's such a loser that he can't get any other girls. That's a shame man. He really needs to move on.

Hyde (Smiling): Jackie really said all this, huh? I can't wait to tell Donna. You like chick fights, right?

Matt (Confused): Of course I do. Why?

Hyde (standing up): Oh, no reason. See ya.

Hyde quickly turns back to Matt.

Hyde: Oh, and if you hit on Donna-I'll kill you. Here's some advice: She'll always be Forman's girl so get over it!

Hyde leaves and heads to the kitchen.

Scene 5-Donna's Kitchen.

Jackie is sitting at Donna's kitchen table, quietly thinking. Hyde walks in.

Jackie: Oh…hi.

Hyde: Hey. 

He sits down across from her at the table.

Jackie: Great party.

Hyde: Oh, yeah. Cheap beer, disco music, and Donna's famous dip--you can't get much crazier then that.

Jackie: Oh well- I'm sure you and your date will find a lot of "crazy" things to do afterwards.

Hyde: Only if she's lucky. Speaking of dates, I just had a very interesting conversation with yours.

Jackie (Eyes Widen): About what??

Hyde: Oh, about the meaning of life, the existence of God, and something else…now...what was it? Oh, yes his undying crush on Donna!

Jackie (in fake shock): That bastard! And I thought he really liked me!

Hyde: No, you didn't.

Jackie: Yes, I did.

Hyde: No, you didn't. And if you don't start telling the truth I'm going to tell Donna all of the crappy things you said about her. Do you really think you can stand up to a giant?

Jackie: No. (Pause) Fine. I lied to Matt so he would come here. I needed a last minute date and he was all I could think of. But believe me, if I had just an hour more, I could have found someone better.

Hyde: I believe you.

Jackie (upset): No you don't. You think I need to beg my poor friend Hyde to take me out whenever Kelso and I are broken up.

Hyde: When have you done that?

Jackie: Let me think. The prom., Veterans Day….

Hyde: Ok. So you cried a little to get me to take you to the prom. So what? If I really didn't want to go, I could have said no. Plus, I asked you out on our Veterans Day date. 

Jackie: That is true. Why did you do that? 

Eric comes busting through the kitchen door.

Eric: Hyde, man! You're missing it! That Mandy girl is totally hitting on Pam Macy. I think they might make out.

Hyde: Good for Mandy.

Jackie: Umm..isn't she suppose to be with you?

Hyde: Mandy doesn't like the fellas.

Eric looks up at the ceiling.

Eric: Thank you God!

Eric runs back into the living room.

Jackie: Why did you bring her?

Hyde (shrugs): She was alone at the Hub, and she mentioned that she digs Pam Macy. Who am I to deprive a party of possible lesbian action?

Jackie: But Pam's with Kelso.

Hyde: Pam's with everybody.

They laugh.

Jackie: So we both managed to find dates that are completely unattracted to us. 

Hyde: Looks like it.

Jackie: That is so sad!

Hyde: Not as sad as Kelso trying to spy on us from the backyard.

(Jackie has her back to the kitchen door.)

Jackie: Really?

Hyde: Yeah, he's peeking in the little window on the door.

Jackie: When will he realize it's over and just leave me alone?

Hyde: Maybe now…..

Hyde leans over and kisses her. Neither pulls away for a few moments. Then Jackie looks at him.

Jackie: Is he gone?

Hyde: Huh? Oh, yeah. I guess.

Jackie: Oh, good. 

They stare at each other.

Eric runs back into the kitchen.

Eric: The fun is over! Kelso and Pam just left to go make out in his van. What a bummer.

Eric grabs a beer and leaves.

Hyde (looks embarrassed): So. I better get going.

Jackie: Wait. Steven, was Kelso really looking at us in the backyard?

Hyde: If I say no, would you be disappointed?

Jackie: Nope.

Hyde: Then, no. (Pause) But can we not make a big drama out of this? It was just a kiss. You know, like on Veterans Day.

Jackie: Oh.

Hyde: Yep, it means nothing.

Jackie: I get the point. 

Jackie gets up.

Jackie: I'm going to go home.

Hyde: Fine.

Jackie walks out of the kitchen and into the living room.

Hyde(to himself): What did I just do?

Donna (entering the kitchen): That was going to be my question.

Hyde: I thought you were staying out of this.

Donna: I changed my mind. Why did Jackie just walk out of here like her puppy had just died?

Hyde: She looked upset? 

Donna: More like devastated.

Hyde: We kissed.

Donna: That's great! At least, I bet it was great. Wasn't it great?

Hyde: Nope. It was nothing.

Donna: This again? I know you both felt something on Veteran's Day and you both felt something now! So suck it up Steven Francis Hyde and tell her that!

Hyde: What are you talking about?

Donna: She told me that she felt something when you guys kissed before. I think she was just too scared of rejection to say anything. You know, you use to be pretty damn mean to her.

Hyde: Can I help it if I have a way with burns?

Donna: It doesn't matter- that was the past. Now go and fix this you idiot!

Hyde stands up.

Hyde: Whatever man, I don't need to fix anything. Jackie's at home, and I'm going to go to bed. All is right with the world. 

Hyde opens the back door.

Donna: This is probably your last chance with her- you know that right?

Hyde shrugs and walks out the door.

Please be kind, and reviewJ

Chapter 6: No one can resist Jackie forever, can they?


	6. Chapter 6

****

**_A/N: This chapter picks up where Chapter 5 left off. It's still the night of the party –only a few hours later. Also, Bob was out of town, which is why Donna could have the party and Eric could sleep over. I forgot to mention that. I know a lot happens in this chapter, but hopefully everyone will like how it turned out! Please review because I love reviews!_**

Chapter 6 

**Hyde's bedroom**

**Hyde is lying on his bed. He hears voices in the basement and sits up to listen**

**Off screen:**

Jackie: No, Michael I wasn't jealous of you and Pam Macy tonight!!

Kelso: Don't be silly, Jackie! Of course you were-- because you still want me.

Jackie: I don't want you! I'll never want you again! We made a horrible couple! 

Kelso: You don't mean that!

Jackie: I do! I'd rather date Fez or Eric or

Kelso: Hyde? 

Jackie: Even Hyde.

Kelso: Damn Jackie! You suck! How can we get back to doing it-if  your being so mean to me?

Jackie (seriously): I'm not trying to be mean, Michael. I care about you and I want us to be friends, but we'll never go out again.

**Silence.**

**Hyde leans closer to the door to hear Kelso's response.**

Kelso: I don't accept that. One day, after I've thought up the perfect plan, you'll love me again!

Jackie: Please stop this! It's insane! No plan will trick me into being your girlfriend again!

**Hyde walks out of his room to where Jackie and Kelso are talking.**

Hyde: Could you guys shut up? I'm trying to sleep! What the hell time is it anyway?

Kelso: Midnight, and I'll stay up all night if I have to-just to win Jackie back.

Jackie (groans): I'm going home. 

Kelso reaches out and grabs her arm.

Kelso: No, wait….

Jackie: What?

Kelso: You can't go home. You're all alone in that big house with so many king-sized beds (He trails off in thought) I better drive you home!

Jackie: I'd rather walk.

Hyde (sighs): I can't believe I'm going to say this but I think you better let Kelso drive you home. You can't just go walking around the streets this late. 

Jackie: I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself!

Hyde: Oh, right-you're all grown up. Grown women always carry around unicorn purses!

Jackie looks down at her purse with a small unicorn embroidered in the corner.

Jackie: Hey! This was a gift! 

Hyde: From Daddy?

Hyde laughs.

Jackie: Um…no….I don't get gifts from Daddy anymore! It's from a business associate!

Hyde: Right. A cheese business associate.

Jackie: At least I'm in a business! What's yours? The I-don't-know-how-to-brush-my-hair business?

Hyde reaches up and touches his curly hair, slightly flustered from the comment.

Kelso (laughing): This is great guys! I could sit here and listen to this all night!

Jackie: Don't you have the Queen of Skanks waiting in your van?

Kelso: I knew I was forgetting something! 

Kelso runs out the back door.

Jackie: I guess I'll be going too.

Hyde: I thought you left Donna's house two hours ago?

Jackie: (embarrassed): I did. But I had to come back because I left my purse there.

Hyde: Jackie Burkhardt ran out of someplace with out her purse? You must have been in a hurry.

Jackie: Yeah, well…I guess I was.

Hyde: Look, why don't you just go crash over at Donna's tonight? There's no way you can walk home alone.

Jackie: Since when do you care so much about my safety?

Hyde (ignores her): Are you going to the Pinchotti's or what?

Jackie: I can't. When I went back there to get my purse, Eric was still over there. Apparently, he told Red that he's sleeping at Fez's so Donna and him can have some alone time. (Pause) Personally, I think that's just gross. 

Hyde: Ok. New plan. You can just sleep on the couch for tonight and I'll drive you home in the morning. But you have to be quiet, ok? Red gets kinda grouchy when he finds teenage girls sleeping in his basement.

Jackie: I don't know. I really don't want to stay here with you.

Hyde: Jackie, I'm tired and I just want to go back to sleep. Can we please not do this now?

Jackie: Fine. If you want to just ignore the fact that you kissed me and then totally burned me that's ok. I'm over it, because, like you said-it was NOTHING.

Silence

Hyde: Whatever.

Hyde walks to his room and comes out with a blanket and pillow. Neither one of them say a word as Jackie lays down on the couch. Hyde walks back to his room.

Hyde (under his breath): Oh, yeah. This was great idea.

He shuts his bedroom door. 

**Later that night….**

**Scene 2**

**Forman's kitchen**

**Red is loudly rummaging through the freezer.**

Red (to himself): Where in the hell is my Rocky Road?

Continues rummaging.

Red (to himself): Those damn kids probably ate it! Don't they have their own god damn ice cream? 

**Kitty comes into the kitchen in her robe.**

Kitty: Red Forman- it is three in the morning! What are you doing?

Red: I'm sorry Kitty. I just wanted some…um…vegetables. You know how I love carrots!

Kitty: Lying does not make Baby Jesus very happy, now does it?

Red: I just wanted some ice cream! Is that so wrong?

Kitty: Can't you wait until a reasonable hour?

Red: Do I ask you that when you drink a box of wine at 11 am?

Kitty: There's some more Rocky Road in the deep freeze. 

Kitty starts to walk down the steps.

Red: Now you're talking!

Jackie hears them and quickly jumps off the couch with the blanket and pillow. She runs into Hyde's room and quietly shuts the door.

**Hyde's room. **

Jackie (whispering close to Hyde's ear): Move over, Steven!

She tries to shove him over, but he won't budge.

Jackie: Steven! Move your butt over! I need to get in!

She tries to shake him awake.

Hyde (still asleep): Go away Forman. I'm busy.

Jackie: Steven, it's Jackie. And you're not very busy. So move over!

Hyde  (still asleep): Busy…with Jackie…come back later Forman.

Jackie: Busy with Jackie? 

Jackie leans closer in .

Jackie: Busy how?

Hyde (suddenly sits up in bed): Jackie. What are you doing in here?

He looks at her weirdly.

Hyde: Have you been sitting there watching me sleep?

Jackie: No! I came in because Red and Kitty came downstairs and I didn't want them to see me. Then I tried to get you to move over and you started talking in your sleep!

Hyde (looks slightly panicked) : Talking? About what?

Jackie (thinks quickly): The Partridge Family!

Hyde : Oh right. Yeah. I was dreaming about kicking David Cassidy's ass. Why did you have to ruin that? 

Jackie: Sorry. But can you please give me some room now?

Hyde: No way. You can just sleep on the floor.

Jackie looks at the floor. It's covered with magazines, socks, and dirty clothes.

Jackie: That is no where for a lady like me to sleep! 

Hyde (sighs): Fine. But you stay over on your side. No cuddling crap.

Jackie: Perfect.

Jackie gets in bed and Hyde tries to huddle in the corner, as far away from her as possible.

Jackie starts to lightly snore.

Hyde: You're a sleep already? 

Hyde looks over at her. He stares for a minute.

Hyde:  Stupid Jackie dreams….

He lays down on his pillow, slightly closer to her, with his arms under his head.

Jackie turns in her sleep and puts her head on his chest.

Hyde instinctively puts his arm around her. The movement causes Jackie to wake up.

Jackie( looks up at Hyde):Steven?.

Hyde (looks down at her): What?

They lean and kiss for a moment.

Jackie: Goodnight.

Hyde: Night Jacks.

They both fall asleep.

**Scene 3-The Next day.**

Eric (knocking on Hyde's door): Hyde, wake up man! My mom has lunch ready! You've been sleeping all morning!

Hyde's eyes open. 

Hyde: (mumbles to himself): I have to do something about these stupid dreams.

He rolls over and sees Jackie.

Hyde: Oh.

Eric continues knocking.

Eric: Come on! Get up! You can do it!

Eric opens the door.

Eric: OH MY FREAKING LORD! 

Eric covers his eyes

Eric: I'm blind! I've seriously lost my eyesight! 

Hyde: Shut up, Forman! Do you want Red to come running down here?

Eric quickly closes the door.

Eric (softer): Sorry. I mean, I knew you liked her and I knew that one day this might happen but.. (Pause) Nothing could prepare me for this sight. Not even a life of Jedi training.

Hyde: It's nothing, so just keep your girly trap shut.

Eric: Right. Nothing. Hyde and his little Jackie just slept in the same bed together all night long with out ever touching each other. Sure. (He winks) I got you.

Jackie opens her eyes.

Jackie: Does kissing count as touching? Cause its lip touching but what are lips really? And why are they so red?

Hyde: Have you been pretending to be asleep this whole time?

Jackie: Maybe. It's a good way to hear what others say about you. It's way better than eavesdropping.

Eric (in shock): Kissing? There was kissing? Hyde was kissing the Devil in my house?

Hyde (punches Eric's arm): Shut up.

Eric and Jackie looked surprised. 

Hyde: What?

Eric: Aren't you just the cutest little knight in shining armor defending his love's honor?

Jackie: Leave Steven alone, Eric!

Eric: Oh, and look at how Jackie jumps to define her man! This is all just too sweet for words!

Eric opens the door.

Eric: Excuse me. I just have to go and tell every single person I know about this.

Eric leaves.

Hyde: What an ass.

Jackie gets out of bed

Jackie: Do you think you could drive me home now?

Hyde gets up and reaches for his keys.

Hyde: Sure.  (Pause) Are you ok with this? I mean, don't you want to have some lengthily conversation about what last night meant and all?

Jackie: Nope.

Hyde: Nope? 

Jackie: No. I don't want to ruin things. I guess we can just see what happens.

Jackie lightly kisses him.

Hyde: I have to say-I don't hate this new Jackie. Less talk. More making out. That could really work for you.

Jackie kisses him again, and they leave the room.

Scene 4- The Basement 

**That Evening….**

**Hyde is sitting in his usual chair watching T.V.**

**Eric and Donna enter.**

Eric: Well, look who it is! Point Place's own Romeo!

Donna: Cut it out Eric. Hyde, I think it's great that after all of my hard work, you have finally gotten the girl.

Hyde: I wouldn't quite say that.

Donna: what do you mean? You and Jackie spent last night sleeping together! I think that officially makes you a couple! 

Hyde: We kissed a few times. It wasn't a big deal. And for once, Jackie agrees with me.

Eric (confused): So you're not planning on moving into the Burkhardt mansion?

Hyde: Afraid not. Jackie and I are just going to see how it goes. Which is great, because I think that means a lot of making out with out any of that annoying talking stuff.

Donna: Oh, yeah. This is going to last really long. You two are totally in love with each other. You can't just "make out" with the person you love.

Hyde: First of all, I don't love her. She's hot and only mildly irritating, which is pretty good in my book. (Pause)  Second of all, the only type of a relationship a guy like me can have is an all-physical one. Squares like you and Forman-just don't understand free sprits like Jacks and me. 

Eric: Squares? You're saying that Donna and I are squares? And Jackie is a free spirit? Has she totally warped your brain? What has happened to the Hyde I use to know and love?

The door opens and Kelso and Fez walk in.

Kelso: Man! I got so much action last night! That Pam Macy is one wild woman!

Fez: Too bad her stupid cousin is not!

Donna: You mean Pam is related to some one who wouldn't put out?

Fez: Not only would her cousin not put out. She is going to be a nun! She kept talking all night about vows of chastity. That means no sex! Ever! Not even with a sexy foreign guy like me.

Eric: That's too bad, Fez. I really thought this was going to be your big chance to get herpes.

Fez (sad): Me too.

Kelso: Don't be sad there buddy! Look at me, my Win-Jackie-Back plan totally bombed, but I have a smile on my face!

Fez: That is because you had wild animal sex all night in your van!

Kelso: Yeah, my van was a rocking! (Pause) But seriously, all I really wanted was to get Jackie back.

Eric: Yeah, well. You can kiss that idea goodbye.

Kelso: What does that mean?

Donna: Well, maybe Jackie has finally moved on for good.

Kelso (thinking): What's his name? Was it that Matt jerk? I'll kick his ass!

Hyde: No, it's NOBODY. So you guys should just shut up.

Eric and Donna stare at Hyde.

Donna: What?

Kelso: You heard him. Jackie is still available for some Kelso loving. You know, she can't resist that. 

Eric: really? Tell us more. Hyde, wouldn't you love to hear more?

Hyde: Um…sure.

Kelso: WELL, Jackie loves it when I kiss her neck. It gets her all hot. She totally starts ripping off my clothes. All I have to do is find a way get her to let me kiss her neck, and will be doing it in no time.

Jackie walks in.

Eric: Oh, hey there Jackie!

Everyone stares at her.

Jackie: What?

Jackie sits down next to Kelso on the couch.

Kelso: Hi Jackie. 

Kelso brushes Jackie's hair off her shoulder.

Jackie: Michael, what do you think your doing?

Kelso: Oh, nothing.

Jackie gives him a dirty look and turns to Donna.

Jackie: That was a pretty good party last night. 

Donna: Yeah, I think it went well. Even if that kid Matt kept following me around. What's his problem?

Jackie: Oh, he's just insane. Yep, totally crazy.

Kelso leans in  to Jackie's neck.

Suddenly Hyde gets up and smacks Kelso on the head from behind the couch.

Hyde: I'd rethink that if I were you.

Jackie: What's going on?

Kelso: Nothing. 

Hyde: Kelso was just about to try and make a move on your neck.

Jackie (jumps up from her seat and stands next to Hyde): Eww! Michael that is so disgusting! Leave my neck alone!

Jackie smiles to Hyde.

Jackie: Umm…do you think you can help me with something….in your room? I need some help with a paper on the War of 1812.

Hyde: Sure. I actually know a lot about that… like it took place in 1812.

They walk out of the room.

Kelso: The War of 1812! I know about that too! It's when all of the Indians fought those cowboys over custard.

Eric: What? I'm not even sure how to start to explain how many things are wrong with that.

Donna: Don't bother. Look, Kelso, even if you were the smartest guy alive, Jackie wouldn't want you in there with her.

Fez: Yes, it seems she prefers Hyde these days.

Kelso: Ok. Either you guys aren't talking about schoolwork or I'm confused.

Fez: Jackie likes Hyde you fool!

Eric: How did you know that?

Fez: Oh, you all think that your little friend Fez doesn't notice things. But I do. I see everything. Which reminds me, Eric you really need to start talking care of Donna's "needs", if you know what I mean.

Eric: I'm going to have to start nailing the curtains shut from now on.

Donna: Well, he does have a point…

Kelso (interrupting): Wait, you guys. I don't think Hyde is helping Jackie with history in there! I think they're doing something else! But what could it be…..

Eric: Nothing. I'm sure it's nothing.

Donna: Maybe they're doing a puzzle. I think Hyde just got a new "overthrowing the government" jigsaw set.

Kelso: No. I think I better just go and take a look.

Eric, Donna, and Fez: NO!!

They reach out and try to hold Kelso back but he breaks away and opens Hyde's door.

Hyde and Jackie are sitting on Hyde's bed making out.

Kelso (looks clearly upset): How could this happen?

Jackie: Michael…

Hyde: Kelso man….

Kelso turns and runs out the basement door. 

Jackie stands up .

Jackie: I better go talk to him.

Hyde (bitter): Yeah. Sure. Go make sure Kelso's all better.

Jackie: Steven! It's not like that!

Hyde: Whatever. I said- Just go!

Jackie looks at him, sighs, and leaves.

Eric, Fez, and Donna are standing in the doorway to Hyde's room.

Eric (laughing): Trouble in paradise?

Hyde closes the door on them, sits down on his bed, and puts his head in his hands. 

**Chapter 7: **

Kelso's reaction, Hyde and Jackie work some things out.

Chap. 7 may be my last chapter. 

Please be kind, and review!!!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Don't know where this came from or if you'll like it. But if you do: please review! This chapter takes place directly after the last one. No time has passed.

**Scene 1 **

**The Hub**

**Kelso is sitting inside alone. He is surrounded by loads of fries, burgers, and milkshakes. He is eating them quickly, tossing the wrappers, and eating more. Jackie walks by the window, peers in to see him, and walks in.**

Jackie: Hey (she sits down next to him)

Kelso: You know-you have some nerve coming here. This place doesn't serve evil ex-girlfriends who French kiss their ex's best friends.

Jackie: Michael…        

Kelso: You heard me; so you better just get out of here.

Jackie: Would you please stop wolfing down those fries for two seconds, and let me talk to you? (She grabs the bucket of fries from him).

Kelso: Hey. They're mine. I tricked a perfectly innocent freshman into buying them-not you. (He grabs them back)

Jackie: Fine. If you want to get all fat and gross from too much fast food-that's up to you.

Kelso (looks at all the food he ate): Well, my looks are really all I have at this point. (He shoves them away).

Jackie: Look, Michael. I'm really sorry that you had to find out about Steven and I the way that you did. But honestly, it just happened last night. Well, there was the kiss at Donna's but that was really not my fault. I mean, Donna sort-of set it up….(trails off).

Kelso: What?? Donna knew about this. Geez, how many of my friends are against me? What did you do to them?

Jackie (shocked): Nothing!! Why would you say that?

Kelso: Well, it use to be that everyone hated you and tried to get me to break up with you. (sighs) The good old days…but now…it's like they have a Jackie Burkhardt fan club and Steven Hyde is the president. And that's just weird, ok? Cause Steven Hyde would never lead a fan club.

Jackie: It's not like that. It's just that some people we both know thought that Steven and I had something going between us. It was all innocent.

Kelso: Until you started doing it with him all night in the Foreman's basement!

Jackie: I did no such thing! And how dare you say that! I know you're mad, but you have no right to imply that.

Kelso: I'm not implying anything. I'm saying it right out. YOU BANGED HYDE!

Jackie gets up and slaps Michael's face.

Jackie: Fine then. I really don't care what your feelings are about Steven and I. We're together so you'll just have to get use to it.

Kelso: Oh, no I don't.

Jackie: I think you do. How are you going to avoid it when we're making out in the basement right in front of you?

Jackie storms out.

Kelso runs to the door and calls out.

Kelso: Maybe I won't be in the basement anymore!!!!

Scene 2-the Basement 

**2 days later….**

Eric and Donna are cuddled on the couch, Fez is on the other end, and Jackie is sitting on Hyde's lap. They are watching Charlie's Angels.

Fez: Oh, this is a great episode.

Eric: Aren't they all my dear Fez?

Donna: And why would that be?

Eric: Oh..Umm…well, the incredible screenwriting of course.

Donna: (she playfully shoves him): Yeah right.

Eric (thinks for a minute): Aren't we missing something here? Fez makes a Charlie's Angles remark, I get in trouble with Donna, and…..what is it….

They all think.

Eric: I know. Kelso tries to reach out to the T.V. and touch Kate Jackson's boobs. 

Donna: Hey, you're right. Where the hell has Kelso been for the past 2 days?

Jackie: I don't know. I mean who cares? What's the big deal is all I'm saying? (She jumps off of Hyde) What exactly are you saying Donna?

Hyde: Whoa…calm down there. I don't think Donna was saying anything.

Jackie: Oh, of course. You just take her side. Typical.

Jackie heads for the door. Fez jumps up to block her.

Fez: Wait just a minute there my foxy friend. What has happened to my dear sweet Kelso?

Jackie: Beats me.

Donna: Fess up Jackie.

Jackie (sighs): Fine. I may know something.

Jackie sits in the lawn chair.

Jackie: Well, remember when I went looking for him after he caught me kissing Hyde?

Hyde: I thought you said you couldn't find him and that you didn't care because he was a big fat jerk?

Jackie: I only said that so you wouldn't be mad at me for going to talk to him.

Hyde: Mad? Mad? Oh, I'm not mad. Sure. It makes perfect sense for my girlfriend to run to her ex. 

Everyone turns to stare at him.

Eric: Why is this happening to me? First, I have to see you two kissing or whatever you do. And now the devil has brain washed you into calling her your girlfriend? Please, say it ain't so!

Jackie runs over to hug Hyde.

Jackie: Oh, baby! 

Hyde brushes her off.

Hyde: Yeah, yeah. You're my girlfriend. Big deal. It's just a formal label used by the government to keep everyone in their neat little places.

Donna: Well, I guess Jackie has just made you a tool of the government then. (Eric and Donna laugh).

Fez: Can we please focus here, people? Now, where is Kelso?

Jackie: Ok…so I found him in the Hub stuffing his face with food. I told him that was totally not good for his diet and that no one…

Eric: Jackie!!

Jackie: Right. So anyway, I tried to tell him that I was sorry that he found out the way he did. But he kept on saying all of these rude things. And then I got so mad that I slapped him and ran out.

Eric: That still doesn't explain his disappearance from the Basement.

Jackie: Well, see…I kind of told him that he had to get use to Steven and my love because he was going to see us making out a lot-you know-since we're all friends. And he got this dumb idea in his head that maybe he wouldn't come around anymore.

Eric: You chased Kelso away!

Jackie: I didn't meant too. He was being so cruel. He kept saying that I slept with Steven which is not true and totally not his business.

Hyde: Thanks for telling everyone that I had a hot chick in my bed all night and couldn't even score!

Eric: That is good gossip and remind me to burn you with it later. But right now we need to find Kelso.

Donna: It's probably not a big deal. I mean, who is Kelso going to hang out with to replace us? 

Fez: You know. I did see him with two burly looking fellows in the hallways yesterday. They had this charming routing of taking something, breaking it, and then handing it back. Kelso looked very happy with them.

Eric: Destroy and Give back? Oh no. 

Jackie: Whose Destroy and Give back?

A thought bubble appears above Eric's head playing a flashback from Season 1 of Destroy and Give beak breaking his pencil and then handing it back to him in class.

Eric (jumps up): No time to talk. Gotta save Kelso before it's too late.

The gang minus Hyde and Jackie leave.

Hyde: Why didn't you tell me about this before?

Jackie: I don't know. I didn't want you to be upset. I wasn't trying to run to Kelso. I  just wanted to talk to him. 

Hyde: Yeah, but you just ran out after him. I guess it just felt like old times with you chasing after Kelso.

Jackie: Well, those days are over. I told Kelso that I didn't care how he felt because we were going to be together. He'll get over it.

Hyde: I'll probably be sick of you in a few weeks anyway. So I'm sure he'll have a shot soon.

Jackie (gets up and hits him): Steven!

Hyde pulls her back onto his lap and they kiss.

Hyde: Better make that a few months….

Scene 3 

**The HUB**

**Donna, Eric, and Fez wander inside to find Destroy and Giveback harassing a boy. Kelso is standing behind them. Destroy reaches out and grabs the Boy's glasses and breaks them, then Giveback hands them to him. They both turn to Kelso.**

Destroy: That's your cue dude.

Giveback: Yeah. If this going to work. You have to know your cue!

Kelso: Oh right. 

He steps up to the boy and points.

Kelso (with out enthusiasm): HA.HA. You-got-burned.

The boy just walks away.

Destroy: You suck Dude. You better practice.

They walk over to the corner to scout out new victims.

Eric, Donna, and Fez run over to Kelso.

Eric: Kelso, what is going on?

Donna: Yeah, since when did you start hanging out with these guys?

Destroy and Giveback turn to them.

Donna: Not that they aren't fine upstanding young men. (Whispers to Kelso) But there not exactly you're kind of friends. 

Kelso: Oh, and who are my  friends? You guys (laughs) PLEASE!

Fez: But Fez is your friend!

Kelso: Maybe. But Big D and Hyde aren't.

Donna: Fine. So I knew about Jackie and Hyde. Big Deal. I knew about Laurie and you and I never told Jackie. So it' s even. I've managed to hide things from two of my close friends.

Fez: Umm…Donna, that doesn't make you sound like a very nice friend.

Donna: Shut up Fez. I'm working an angle here.

Eric: It doesn't matter Kelso. All that matters is that we've been friends since forever and nothing should break that up. I mean, do you really want to hang out with these guys? It's so bizarre. It's like Destroy, Giveback, and Mock. Very unsettling.

Kelso: Well, they like me, ok?

Eric: But you're not like them. Sure you may break stuff from a few freakishly stupid accidents but you never would mock. 

Destroy and Giveback nudge Kelso.

Giveback: Let's go.

They stroll over to a girl. Destroy takes her calculator and breaks it. Giveback hands it to her, They both turn to Kelso. Kelso looks at them and then at Eric, then to the girl.

Kelso: But guys, it's a girl…and she's hot. You never said anything about hot girls….

Destroy: Are you wussing out on us? 

Kelso: Well…no…but….

Kelso runs out the door. Eric, Donna, and Fez run after him.

Destroy and Giveback shrug.

Destroy: Oh well. The mocking really just rubbed it in anyway. I think we're better off.

Giveback: totally dude!

They laugh and thump into each other.

Scene 4 

**The Hub Parking lot.  Kelso is crouched down behind a dumpster. Donna, Eric, and Fez are looking for him.**

Eric: Kelso?

Donna: Hello?

Fez: They're are lots of pretty ladies out here and they're horny…

Kelso jumps up.

Kelso: really? (looks around) Oh you lied. Big surprise.

Eric: C'mon Kelso. Just come back to the basement with us and everything will be fine again.

Kelso: No.

Fez: I will give you some of my candy.

Kelso: No way.

Donna: I'll let you see my bra strap.

Kelso (considers it): I just can't you guys. It would be too weird. Jackie and I aren't even friends. And what would I say to that backstabbing bastard? I mean, Hyde? (Thinks) Wait a minute. Maybe I will come back if you guys can get Jackie to do one little thing for me.

Donna: What is it?

Eric: Yeah, I'm sure she'll do it.

They lean in close and Kelso whispers it to them.

Scene 5 

**The Basement**

**Later that day…**

**Jackie and Hyde are making out on the couch when Donna, Fez, and Eric return.**

**Hyde: **SO , did you find the big baby?

Donna: Yeah. He was at the Hub with his new pals.

Eric: Man, those guys are creepy.

Jackie: Did you convince him to stop being stupid and show his face again?

Fez: Actually we did.

Hyde: Great. Then this whole trivial mess can be over. God, Kelso can be so overdramatic.

Eric: He can, can't he? I mean, he just can't accept that he'll be seeing his friend kiss his ex in front of him forever with out fight. But who can blame him? I mean, it is a hard thing to see. Who would fault him if he asked for one tiny gesture of friendship before he let it all go?

Hyde: Foreman, what are you trying to say?

Eric: Kelso wants Jackie to go with him to the Homecoming Dance as a friendly gesture. That way they can talk and become friends again. Plus, He'll see it as a sign of good faith from you.

Hyde: No way.

Jackie: yuck. I am not wasting a big dance on a friendship date. No way. I'm going with Hyde.

Hyde: Who said anything about a Homecoming dance? I don't do Homecoming.

Jackie: But Hyde, I may be named to the Homecoming court. You have to go with me.

Hyde: Babe, I'll do a lot of things. But going to a school dance to celebrate the football team's big game isn't one of them.

Donna: Great. Then it's all settled. Hyde will stay home. Jackie will go with Kelso. And come Monday morning, all will be right in Point Place once again.

Jackie: (sighs dejectedly): Fine. Whatever. I just want us all to be friends again.

Hyde: Jackie, you can't be considering this. If you go with Kelso, we're through.

Jackie: But Hyde, you don't want to go with me! Besides, it's one date out of friendship. If it means everyone will be happy, then who cares? Don't you trust me?

Hyde: Not really. Since when do I trust anyone?

Jackie: Great. Well, if you can't even trust me, then what are we doing together?

Hyde and Jackie stare at each other.

Jackie: I'm leaving.

Hyde: So go already.

Jackie: Fine.

Jackie grabs her coat and leaves as Hyde storms off to his room.

Eric: Well, I'd say that went well.

A/N: ok, SO I said this might be the last chapter and I lied! I could have written more in this chapter but I'm tired and decided to make it into another chapter. That chapter will deal with: The Homecoming Dance and it's outcome, Jackie/Kelso's issues, Jackie/Hyde's issues and if there is time Hyde/Kelso's issues. If not, then I guess another chapter will be added. But I promise, I am getting ready to tie this story up and have a bunch of plot bunnies in my head for future fics…So please review. What did you think? Was it horrible? Wonderful? LET me know…


	8. Chapter 8

**Please see the author's note at the end. Thank you!**

Scene 1: Donna's room

Donna and Jackie are sitting on Donna's bed trying to do homework. Jackie keeps writing something, scribbling it out, writing it again, and scribbling it out….

Donna: Jackie, what the hell? You're going to scratch a whole right through the paper.

Jackie: It doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Who cares about a stupid essay on The Mayflower Compact when your life is in shambles! (She leans over and starts to cry on Donna's shoulder).

Donna pats her head for a minute then pulls Jackie off of her.

Donna: Look, don't you think that you're being just a tiny bit overdramatic?

Jackie: No.

Donna: C'mon. Is having to decide whether you go to some lame high school dance really life or death?

Jackie: Yes, Donna! What am I suppose to do? Unlike you, my loyal fans expect to see me at the dance. I was even tipped off by that nerd who spends his lunches in the Activities room that the Homecoming ballots have Janice Leary and I tied for Junior Homecoming Court.

Donna: So go. Maybe all of your dreams will come true and you'll get to tell all of your grandkids about the day you were on Point Place High's Homecoming court. (Rolls her eyes) Big Deal.

Jackie (ignores her). But if I go, then Hyde will be really mad at me. And I wouldn't care but he did just call me his girlfriend and he even bought me a hamburger the other day.

Donna: Hyde bought you something? He didn't steal it? 

Jackie: Nope.

Donna: Wow. He's in deeper than I thought. (Pause) Ok. So then don't go.

Jackie: Things are just so easy for you in your little magical Giant world aren't they? (Pause) Here –in my normal sized world-they're just a little more complicated. If I say no to Kelso-then he might never show his idiotic face in the basement again-and Fez and Eric will hate me.

Donna: Since when do you care what Fez and Eric think?

Jackie: I don't. But they are Hyde's best friends and if they hate me-then I'll be back to the same place I was when I first started dating Kelso and coming to the basement.(Pause)  You know, I always knew you guys hated me. Not that I cared or anything. It just made things hard at first.

Donna: Well, Jackie you were always making fun of me! 

Jackie: Well, Donna, you were always wearing plaid! (Jackie looks over and notices that Donna is wearing a plaid shirt). But let's change the subject.

Donna: Fine. Look. All I can say is that you have to do what you think is best. Don't worry about Eric, Fez, Kelso, or Hyde. Do what you think you should do.

Jackie gets up to leave.

Jackie: Gee thanks. That's the same advice Bob gave me.

Donna: Hey, you asked my dad for advice before me?

Jackie (shrugs) Well, he is the sensitive one in your family!

Donna starts to protest but stops as Jackie leaves the room.

Scene 2

The Forman's Kitchen.

Jackie walks in through the sliding doors to see Mrs. Forman cooking at the stove.

Jackie: Hi. Mrs. Forman.

(She sits down at the kitchen table.)

Mrs. Forman: Well hello there dear. I think Steven is down in his room.

Jackie: I don't want to see him. I actually came over to talk to you.

Mrs. Forman's face lights up.

Mrs. Forman: Oh, how nice! You know, I am always here for you kids, and I have a lot of life experience to help guide you. 

Jackie: I know. That's why I came here.

Mrs. Forman: Do you think you could mention that to Eric? You know he can be so stubborn and he never appreciates all of the health pamphlets I bring home to him. Do you need any? (She racers over to a small drawer and pulls out a stack of pamphlets) I have binge drinking, premarital sex, syphilis, herpes, (keeps looking through) oh and this is a good one(She walks over and hands it to Jackie) PREGNANCY!

Jackie: Umm..thanks…but that's not my problem.

Just then Hyde comes in from the living room.

Hyde: Hey, Mrs. Forman-Red wants to know what's for dinner. (He sees Jackie and stops) What are you doing here?

Jackie: Well, I can tell you one thing I'm not doing here- talking to you.

Mrs. Forman: Jackie came here to talk to me sweetie.

Steven: Oh great. Is she making you help her get ready for her big date with Kelso?

Jackie (before Mrs. Forman can answer): Who said that it was a date? 

Steven: So you are going?

Jackie: No. Yes. I mean, I don't know.

Jackie gets up.

Jackie: I can't talk to you now Mrs. Forman. Thank anyway.

Steven: You better go and pick out just the right dress for Saturday. What color goes just right with a moron for a date?

Jackie (angry): Why can't you just go with me, huh? Would it be so hard just to put on a tie, and escort your girlfriend to her homecoming dance?

Steven (angry): Why can't you just forget about some stupid dance, and Kelso's empty threats, and just stay home with me?

Jackie: Because I like getting dressed up, and I like being on the Homecoming Court, and most importantly I like going to dances with you.

Steven: When have I ever gone to a dance with you?  (A look of realization spreads on his face) The Junior Prom doesn't count. You wanted to be there with Kelso-not me.

Jackie: But this is our chance to do it right. This time it won't end with Kelso and I slow dancing and you making out with Pam Macy in the back of my dad's car.

Mrs. Forman (humming) : I am not hearing this.

Jackie and Steven stare at each other.

Steven (firmly) I don't do Homecoming.

Jackie (sadly) Well, I do.

Jackie walks out of the sliding doors.

Scene 3

The next day –Friday

The Basement

Hyde is watching t.v. when Eric comes down the stairs.

Eric: There he is! My own personal orphan Annie.

Hyde: Shut up Forman.

Eric: Poor Hyde. He's just got too many love problems these days. I hate to say it (Pause) Ok. I love to say it. That's what you get for messing around with Jackie.

Hyde: Yeah, well that might be true. But the way I see it , this time it's Kelso's fault. He's just trying to use this Homecoming Dance to get in Jackie's pants.

Eric (serious): So what if he is? He's Kelso. He tries to get in everyone's pants. But if you trust Jackie then there's no problem. We all just go along with Kelso's hair-brained scheme, Jackie shoots him down when he makes a move and comes running home to you. Kelso is forced back into normal basement dwelling and the gang is back intact. Of course, the whole Jackie now dating you thing will still be looming. But life can't be perfect.

Hyde: Let me ask you something and be honest. If Casey Kelso decided to ask Donna to a dance under some ridiculous circumstances (pauses) and you knew it was bogus and all just a plot to get Donna back, would you go along with it?

Eric: One-Casey Kelso is not my friend. Two-Casey Kelso can actually charm the pants of a lady. Michael Kelso just thinks he can.

Hyde: So you wouldn't want her to go? 

Eric: I guess not.

Hyde (smiles) I think I've made my point.

Eric: No, Hyde. This is different. This has to do with a lot more things. Friendship, trust, and Jackie's love for organized fun chaperoned by middle-age teachers in school gyms. She lives for this crap. I just think that if you don't want to go with her, then there's no harm in letting Kelso take her . You get to stay home, and we all get Kelso back in our lives. It's a win-win situation.

Hyde: How is having Kelso back in our lives a good thing?

Eric (shrugs): I don't know. I guess he grows on you. After all of these years, the basement seems empty with out him. He belongs here. 

Hyde:  I don't know man. (Pause) You know what sucks?

Eric: What?

Hyde: This being in a relationship and having to deal with "issues" crap.

Eric: Tell me about it!

Hyde: Oh Please. You love it. 

Eric (shakes his head "No"): Ok. I do. Not the "issues" part, but the relationship stuff. Who knows, maybe Jackie will be the girl to make you love that stuff too.

Hyde: Maybe. If we make it past Saturday.

The door opens and Kelso comes walking in.

Eric: Kelso! You finally came to your senses! Good to see you!

Kelso (looks at Hyde): Yeah, well-Jackie agreed to go to the dance with me, so I' here-just like I said I would be.

Hyde stands up 

Hyde: Scratch that whole making it past Saturday stuff. We won't make it through Friday.

Hyde walks out of the room.

Scene 4

Saturday Night.

Kelso's front porch.

Jackie, dressed in a simple black dress, stands in front of the Kelso's front door. Michael answers the door when she knocks.

Kelso: Jackie you look hot. I mean, you always look good-but tonight-WOW.

Jackie: Thank you Michael. You look lovely yourself.

Kelso: yeah, I know.

Jackie rolls her eyes.

Kelso: So, let's get going. The quicker we get there -the quicker we can go and do it.

Jackie looks shocked.

Kelso: And by do it-I mean start dancing. Geez, Jackie-what did you think I meant?

Jackie: Look, Michael. We aren't going to be doing anything because I'm not going with you.

Kelso: What? You made me get all dressed up and spend five whole dollars on flowers for nothing. That's cruel.

Jackie: Not for nothing. I have a date for you. 

Kelso: Who is it? Is she hot? Oh, who cares if she's hot as long as she's easy!

Jackie: I have it on good authority that she is easy.

Kelso; Bring her on!

Jackie: Wait. First you have to promise that you'll come back to the basement.

Kelso: I don't know….

Jackie: She's pretty slutty….

Kelso: Fine! I promise!

Jackie: Second, you have to at least try to be nice to Steven and me. We're together now. I really care about him. I never thought I would ever feel this way about anyone but you.

Kelso: Yeah, right.

Jackie: No, it's true. I always thought we would end up together. But let's face it –we don't work as a couple. So why can't we be friends?  (Pause) Steven and I need to have our chance at love with out you messing it up. I really like him; enough to be willing to ditch a dance for him and you know that's saying a lot. 

Kelso: Yeah, you would never have ditched a dance for me.

Jackie: That's true. That's why we weren't right for each other and Steven and I are. I'm sorry Michael. But if you really care about me, you'll stop coming up with crazy schemes to break Steven and I apart.

Kelso: Schemes? What crazy schemes?

Jackie: We were together for almost four years! Don't you think I know you better than that? (Pause) Now come on and give me a hug.

They smile at each other and hug Of course; Kelso tries to grab her butt.

Kelso: What? Can't friends give each other friendly butt grabs anymore? What is the world coming too?

Jackie: Just go and pick up your date. It's Pam Macy, of course. She was all too happy to take you off my hands when I called her.

Kelso: Pam Macy, huh? 

Jackie: Yeah, for some strange reason, you two keep finding your way back to each other. Maybe it means something.

Kelso: Yep. That we both like to do it!

Jackie just laughs and walks away.

Scene 5:

The Basement.

Jackie walks through the basement door to find the basement empty.

Jackie: HELLO??? Steven? 

Hyde's voice from off camera:

Hyde: I'm in my room. Hold on a minute.

Jackie: Ok. (Sits down on the couch and flips through a magazine)

I just came over to tell you that I'm not going to the dance with Kelso. I thought I was, but I changed my mind. I don't need stupid things like Homecoming court, and dances anymore…(she looks up and sees Hyde in a coat and tie).

Hyde: That's too bad, because I thought that maybe I could take you to this little dance I had heard of ,and that maybe, you could win some silly high school title while you were there.

Jackie looks shocked.

Jackie: Oh, my God Steven! How did you know that I wasn't going with Michael?

Hyde: Donna. (Pause). I went to talk to her this afternoon about this whole mess, and she told me that you had called her about your decision not to go with Kelso. It just got me thinking. You shouldn't have to give up something that you like to do just because you're with me. Maybe, instead of giving it up, you can bring me along and I'll try not to hate it too much.

Jackie: That is the sweetest thing that anyone has ever done for me!

Hyde: Really? Cause I generally don't like to go around doing sweet things, and I'd like to avoid it in the future.

Jackie: No, No! I like when you're sweet. This is such a great surprise.

They kiss and Hyde breaks the kiss.

Hyde: Hold on. If this was a surprise-then why did you wear that dress over here?

Jackie: What dress? This old things? (Jackie laughs) Maybe Donna warned me that I shouldn't go over to Kelso's in the jeans that I was planning to wear. She suggested something black and sexy.

Hyde: Well, I 'll just have to thank her for that.

They fall down on the couch kissing passionately. Jackie reaches up and pulls Hyde's tie loose.

Jackie: You know what? Let's skip the dance? 

Hyde (looks surprised): After all of this-you want to skip the dance? Woman, you are crazy!

Jackie giggles and lets her hair down.

Jackie: I just think that we have better things to do…..(She jumps up and runs towards Hyde's bedroom) Are you coming?

Hyde rips off his jacket and tie and follows her to the bedroom.

Hyde: I love Homecoming!

THE END.

A/N: Ok. SO THAT'S IT. Jackie and Hyde are happy, Kelso has Pam Macy, and all is right with our favorite Wisconsin gang. I would really appreciate reviews on this chapter. My chap. 7 only got a few reviews (thanks to those reviewers!!!) and feedback on this last chapter is so important to me. I want to know what you thought of the ending and the story itself. Would you be encouraged to read more of my work? 

Thank you so much and thanks for all of the reviews! I have appreciated and taken into account each and every one. You guys are great!


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